So, what is a friend? He/she is somebody who:
A - accepts you as you are,
B - believes in you,
C - calls you just to say "Hi"
D - doesn't give up on you,
E - envisions the whole of you, including the parts-in-progress,
F - forgives your every mistake,
G - gives unconditionally for you,
H - helps you whenever you need it,
I - inspires you to be the best that you can be,
J - just happy to be with you,
K - keeps you close at heart, anytime, anywhere,
L - loves you for who you are,
M - makes a difference in your life,
N - never judges, no matter what you do,
O - offers support when you're feeling tired,
P - picks you up when you fall,
Q - quiets your fears if they arise,
R - raises your spirits when you're feeling down,
S - says nice things about you, yet
T - tells you the truth when you need to hear it,
U - understands you,
V - values you,
W - walks beside you in life,
X - explains things to you if you don't understand,
Y - yells at you when you won't listen, and
Z - zaps you back to reality!
It'd be cool to have friends like that, eh? Not so fast - in a deceitful world like this, driven by materialism, you'd be lucky to get someone to know you and like you well. Sometimes, you're already lucky that you're not betrayed outright.
There's only one way to make true friends - you gotta be one first. Love another as if he/she was already your best, true friend. If no response in kind was given, you are still blessed, for you can love a friend who doesn't loves you back in the same way. Being loved is bliss, but that of loving another is incomparable.
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Spoils that Ruins a Child's Life
If there's one thing I really detest among those my age, its spoilt brats. Why? They get their way too easily. When the adults start being strict, all they have to do is to use the tactics they know will work things their way - crying, pouting, throwing a tantrum and such - and sooner or later, somebody will give in to their wants. And guess what? They won't hesitate to do it again, and again, and again......
I had a kid cousin who was that sort of child. Man, you should see how he screws up his face and cry, throwing cushions about and delibrately hurrting himself, just to get out to buy an ice-cream! And he's not even nine years old. Now, one of the only relatives he didn't dare to come close to easily is me. Hehe, that's because I never comply with him if it's unreasonable and I can help it. Now, I'm crossing my fingers that he'll grow out of it soon. Or maybe he won't at all......
As for how you'll see if the kids (or guys) down the road are spoilt by their parents or guardians, there's many signs, both obvious and subtle, to look out for. Primarily, he'll always want things to go his way, and he'll often resort to tactics that follow the same pattern to do so. A spoilt person is also very mule-headed - you'd be hard-pressed to convince him to do anything he does not want to, taht is, if you make any progress at all. They usually care only for themselves, and wouldn't give a damn if someone else got hurt in any way just so long as they got what they want.
So, its urgent for parents and guardians to recognise and stamp out the spoiltness as soon as possible in children, otherwise they suffer from it as long as they had the attitude. When you interact with such a person, its best if you tell them where your lines are, and hold firm your ground if they crossed it. In this, you might make the person agitated or upset, but its better than to just lie down and be walked over by him.
In short, be strict, or you'll be downtrodden by these spoilt people forever.
I had a kid cousin who was that sort of child. Man, you should see how he screws up his face and cry, throwing cushions about and delibrately hurrting himself, just to get out to buy an ice-cream! And he's not even nine years old. Now, one of the only relatives he didn't dare to come close to easily is me. Hehe, that's because I never comply with him if it's unreasonable and I can help it. Now, I'm crossing my fingers that he'll grow out of it soon. Or maybe he won't at all......
As for how you'll see if the kids (or guys) down the road are spoilt by their parents or guardians, there's many signs, both obvious and subtle, to look out for. Primarily, he'll always want things to go his way, and he'll often resort to tactics that follow the same pattern to do so. A spoilt person is also very mule-headed - you'd be hard-pressed to convince him to do anything he does not want to, taht is, if you make any progress at all. They usually care only for themselves, and wouldn't give a damn if someone else got hurt in any way just so long as they got what they want.
So, its urgent for parents and guardians to recognise and stamp out the spoiltness as soon as possible in children, otherwise they suffer from it as long as they had the attitude. When you interact with such a person, its best if you tell them where your lines are, and hold firm your ground if they crossed it. In this, you might make the person agitated or upset, but its better than to just lie down and be walked over by him.
In short, be strict, or you'll be downtrodden by these spoilt people forever.
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Chinese New Year - Totally New Experience.
This year's CNY was the most special for me - that's because I went to my mother's hometown for most of the holidays. That's 500 km++ from my house - my back hurts from more than 5 hours travelling in the car. Yet, the journey was nothing compared what I experienced there.
First off, let me try to describe my mother's external family to you. The matron was none other than my maternal grandmother, until she passed away a couple of years ago (mourning). After that, the family was divided into three generations. The eldest was the generation of my mum's - my aunts and uncles, who formed the "elders" of the clan. Next up is the Younger Generation A, which consists of my elder cousins, those who were already working, with some already married. The oldest among the group was cousin Kok Heng, married with a thirteen-year old daughter (So that makes me an uncle. Hehe). He was the undisputed ringleader, though he still refers to the elders for family decisions. Lastly, its the Younger Generation B, my age. Amongst them, I'm the third eldest. My niece was in this clique too.
Alright, back to the story. At the end of our journey, warm greetings were already in order. We greet our elders one by one, then clap the backs of those our ages. A little hustling was in order as my cousin Fong wanted to rub my lil' bro's head. Then, we stuff away the things we brought, giving the presents away to some relatives, and settled down for the reunion dinner on the CNY eve. However, there's too much of us for the table, so we take turns to eat our fill. Oops...
Skipping to CNY Day One...... My, my, those red packet stack everyone's holding must be half an inch thick! The elders are giving them out, but they still have a veritable stack left. And those of us that are still single...... I'll leave it to you to guess.
Reverting back to nighttime...... Of course, we play lots of...... music CDs, since firecrackers are not allowed. Still, it was a treat since we get to stay up until well past midnight playing about, something I can hardly do back home.
But, after all the things that we do as a family, there's more within than meets the eye. As I lie down in the wee hours of the morning, thinking, I came upon this conclusion - that its the family bond here that keeps us together, that makes me truly feel at home here. All in all, CNY is, of course, not about enjoying yourself until you reek of enjoyment - its about having and keeping a family that you truly belongs.
Happy New Year to you all, and may you and your families recieved the best blessings from everyone else.
First off, let me try to describe my mother's external family to you. The matron was none other than my maternal grandmother, until she passed away a couple of years ago (mourning). After that, the family was divided into three generations. The eldest was the generation of my mum's - my aunts and uncles, who formed the "elders" of the clan. Next up is the Younger Generation A, which consists of my elder cousins, those who were already working, with some already married. The oldest among the group was cousin Kok Heng, married with a thirteen-year old daughter (So that makes me an uncle. Hehe). He was the undisputed ringleader, though he still refers to the elders for family decisions. Lastly, its the Younger Generation B, my age. Amongst them, I'm the third eldest. My niece was in this clique too.
Alright, back to the story. At the end of our journey, warm greetings were already in order. We greet our elders one by one, then clap the backs of those our ages. A little hustling was in order as my cousin Fong wanted to rub my lil' bro's head. Then, we stuff away the things we brought, giving the presents away to some relatives, and settled down for the reunion dinner on the CNY eve. However, there's too much of us for the table, so we take turns to eat our fill. Oops...
Skipping to CNY Day One...... My, my, those red packet stack everyone's holding must be half an inch thick! The elders are giving them out, but they still have a veritable stack left. And those of us that are still single...... I'll leave it to you to guess.
Reverting back to nighttime...... Of course, we play lots of...... music CDs, since firecrackers are not allowed. Still, it was a treat since we get to stay up until well past midnight playing about, something I can hardly do back home.
But, after all the things that we do as a family, there's more within than meets the eye. As I lie down in the wee hours of the morning, thinking, I came upon this conclusion - that its the family bond here that keeps us together, that makes me truly feel at home here. All in all, CNY is, of course, not about enjoying yourself until you reek of enjoyment - its about having and keeping a family that you truly belongs.
Happy New Year to you all, and may you and your families recieved the best blessings from everyone else.
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