Zheng's Corner

Magi Maxims

2011-05-17T19:27:00.000-07:00

To understand the way of mages and wizards, we must first ask - what is the nature of magic? Some say magic is the way of defying nature, wild and unpredictable. Some say that magic is right there, accessible to anyone "intelligent" enough to find it and willful enough to access it. Some claim that magic is but the manipulation of energy and/or matter.

Whatever the case, in a world where magic exists, it has provided many benefits - usually taken for granted - in the lives of those who know how to wield it. Yet the adage "with great power comes great responsibility" remains firmer than the changes wrought to the dogma of magic. Those who can use magic are often as capable of great good as they are of equally, if not more, powerful destruction.

However, magic is not just a weapon. It can also be a trade, an art, a vision. Those who use magic almost definitely will pursue the study of magic, in an attempt to understand better its nature and its role in the bigger multiverse. Magic is a study as diverse as the study of life itself - branches as unrelated as hypnotism and necromancy can be traced back to magic at their roots. Thus, all wizards immerse themselves eagerly into their pursuits, asking for no more than the time and insight to discover what they seek.

In a way, magic is not so much different from the advanced technology available in this reality - both made contributions to achievements that would be impossible using conventional methods. However, should either fail utterly, what would happen? In each respective reality, both magic and technology would be the foundation for the structure of the society and lives of its inhabitants. The falling of either would almost immediately precede a time of anarchy and chaos, as the world would collapse from the heights it had scaled. In the end, perhaps there would be enough to survive, scavenge, and walk a new path to rebuild the world. Or perhaps the world would be the only thing left, not its current population.

- adapted from various sources

Paladin Precepts

2011-05-15T19:16:00.000-07:00

Paladins are knights who pledged themselves to religion instead of any human liege. They are the military arm of the clergy they serve, sort of an "army of the god" that they believe in. A paladin is well known for his zeal, chivalry as well as nobility, and is often heralded as the savior of humanity from the evil blights the lands.

To people who knew the awful truth, though, a paladin does not make a good friend. He follows a rigid - if not extreme - code of righteousness and morality, and he holds all others with equally high standards. As "mere mortals" would have a few scruples themselves, a proud paladin may often look down upon them with disappointment, if not disdain.

In his believe, a paladin views the world as a chiaroscuro painting - there are no moral standards except black (utter evil) and white (purely sacred). A simplistic view, I'm sure, but too much so. A person can only be standing beside a paladin, or standing against him. Therefore, a lot of conflict may arise because of this simple standpoint.

If one paladin's zeal is considered powerful, what of an order of paladins? Imagine, hundreds or even thousands of warriors, who believe in one god and one cause, charging through any obstacle in their quest for the fulfillment of the order's decrees - sounds way too close to religious fanaticism to me.

Perhaps the flaw of paladins, the one common flaw, is that they devoted themselves too much to the clergy and to their god. For the former, any pragmatic man can break free of his chains easily - "A Paladin's power comes not from the clergy, but from God. With or without the clergy, we are still Paladins." But for the latter, to doubt is to betray - and when religious zeal clashes against common sense, a paladin is in for a terrible dilemma indeed.

- adapted from various sources

Assassin Anecdotes

2011-05-04T23:37:00.000-07:00

Assassins are considered to be an unseemly occupation amongst outsiders. After all, it can't bring good karma for a person who robs other people of their lives on an occupational basis. But to assassins themselves, its sort of a lifetime calling - once you get in, you're usually in for life. And very likely, that life will be very short. Most assassins do not survive to reach the pinnacle of reputation, for a fact.

Assassins are amongst the most biased fighters - the chances of an assassin choosing to fight fair is zero. No "virtually", no "practically", just zero. Even if they can take their targets down in a toe-to-toe brawl, blindfolded and one hand tied to the back, they'd still pull every trick in the book to make sure that they survive, and that they accomplish their mission. Theoretically, the only time an assassin would "fight fair" is when one assassin goes up against another - not for a mission or a job, but for their pride.

Hard to believe, but assassins are just like other people, after all. They have emotions, including guilt, doubt, and fear. For them, the occupational hazard is far more fatal than most, even though the pay is good. Assassins are neither better nor worse than most of us, I think - they just are. To them, there is a price for every life, every soul, and some of them are waiting to see how high theirs can be.

- adapted from various sources

Practicing Card Counting

2011-04-27T06:14:00.000-07:00

Okay, try this:

Shuffle a pack of cards well, then start dealing the cards face-up, one by one. At the same time, keep a silent note of the cards being turned over. With each 2, 4, 5, and 6, minus one to the counter in your head (the counter starts with zero). With each 10, J, Q, K, A, add one from your counter.

Do this as fast as possible, increasing your tempo until the point where you can deal at normal casino speed while keeping an accurate count. Then repeat the whole training, this time while singing to your favourite song on the radio, listening to the evening news, or with whatever distractions you can find.

If you want to beat the house at blackjack, this is the basic card-counting way.

Yu-Gi-Oh 5D's WC 2011 - My Favourite Turbo Duel Deck

2011-04-21T21:48:00.000-07:00

29 Monsters:
Flamvell Guard - 1
Battle Fader - 1
Paguespreader Zombie - 1
Shield Wing - 1
Treeborn Frog - 2
Inmato - 2
Cherry Inmato - 3
D.D. Sprite - 2
Dandylion - 2
Glow-Up Bulb - 1
Zaborg the Thunder Monarch - 2
Caius the Shadow Maonarch - 3
Raiza the Storm Monarch - 2
Granmarg the Rock Monarch - 2
Mobius the Frost Moanrch - 3
Gorz the Emissary of Darkness - 1

7 Speed Spells:
Angel Baton
Book of Moon
Double Summon
Fissure
Heavy Storm
Silver Contrails
Summon Speeder

6 Traps:
Bottomles Trap Hole
Dust Tornado
Mirror Force
Raigeki Break
Solemn Judgement
Torrential Tribute

A Pop-Up Question about Physics

2011-04-21T14:51:00.000-07:00

Why do magnets attract metals?

To be honest, this question hit my mind at 8am, and I though it might be intriguing to answer it using nothing but what's stored in my memory (I do that all the time, being too lazy to flip pages).

Okay, back to the question.

You see, metals consist of, well, metal atoms. These metal atoms are binded together via intermolecular forces known as the metallic bonds. Each metal achieves stable octet configuration invariably by expelling one or more electrons from their outermost shell. The expulsion is done due to the fact that the outermost electrons can obtain enough energy to be "free" and enter the conduction band from the valence band.

Thus, the metal atoms turn into cations, and the expelled electrons sort of coalesces into a mass with spaces between each individual electrons, known as a "sea" or "cloud" of electrons.

In picture, you can imagine a body of water, with electrons taking the place of water molecules, while metal cations are ice cubes, suspended in meticulous order in this "sea". And, knowing electrons, they're not about to sit tight or stay still.

Since these electrons have energy, they moved. Recall the magnetic force - it is present only on an electrically charged particle if the particle moves in any direction different to the direction of the magnetic field. The direction of the magnetic force, if present, will always be perpendicular to directions of both the velocity of the charged particle and the magnetic field.

Equation : (Magnetic Force, F) = (Electric Charge of Particle, q) * (Velocity of Charged Particle, v) x (Magnetic Field Strength, B)

Electrons within the "sea" moves randomly. When a piece of metal is placed within a magnetic field, the electrons within the "sea" experience magnetic force due to their random motion. Keep in mind that even though the net velocity of the masses of electrons are zero, the net magnetic force is not, since movement parallel to the magnetic field lines do not produce magnetic forces.

The force would not be enough to dispatch the electrons from their "sea" - instead the magnetic force pulls the electrons - along with the metal ions towards the source (magnet) where the magnetic field is at its strongest, since a stronger field exerts more magnetic force upon the electrons.

Macroscopically speaking, the metal is pulled towards the magnet due to the magnetic force exerted upon it. Non-metals have no free electrons in the conduction band, that's why they are not attracted towards magnets.

Quantum Fibonacci

2010-03-27T02:21:00.000-07:00

0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21, 34, 55, 89...

Looks familiar? This is a number sequence we'd probably seen in high school maths textbooks, without any idea what it means. This is a Fibonacci sequence, a sequence of number where each term is the sum of the two terms before it. For example, the seventh term, 8, is the sum of the fifth and sixth term, 3 and 5.

What most people didn't realized, though, and what most high school maths teacher got wrong, is that the Fibonacci sequence is actually a geometric progression, with a common ratio of 1.618, which is also known as the Golden Ratio. Try it yourself by expanding the sequence - the answer is true.

But what I find more intriguing is how 0, the first term, can turn into 1, the second term. Surely any number multiplied by zero equals nil, so what happened?

My "conjecture" answer is: quantum theory. Or rather, quantum evolution. To explain this, lets go back to the beginning of life, just as this transition from nil to one occurs in the beginning of the Fibonacci sequence. According to quantum theory, the first replicating protein molecule that forms from the polymerization of amino acids did not occur randomly. Just as a potential - life or not life, for the lack of description - can collapse either way, the environment acts a a measuring tool, which in turn, collapse the potential that allows life to form out of the primordial soup of amino acids.

Life started not only because the environment caused it to happen to the act of measuring, it's also because life is the better measuring tool for any potential. Life then evolved because the environment continues to measure It, even as Life measures Itself.

Similarly, won't that be the way nil became one? A collapse of potential because one is a better measuring tool than nil, then the Golden Ratio kicks in to expand the Fibonacci sequence into the infinite. Of course, you may disregard this as nothing but hogwash, and I accept that, because as I said, this is merely conjecture, not a proven theory.

Also, since the Fibonacci sequence has a common ratio, we can reverse the whole sequence by simply changing the Golden Ratio into a negative number, i.e. -1.618. A reminder that just as there are positives and negatives in maths and numbers, life itself may collapse one way or the other.

... -89, 55, -34, 21, -13, 8, -5, 3, -2, 1, -1, 0

Basics of Max Planck's Quantum Theory

2010-02-07T20:31:00.000-08:00

Einstein's theory of relativity states that a substance has to be either a particle or a wave, but it is not generally known that Max Planck's quantum theory contradicts it, stating that a substance can be both particle and waves, once matter is broken down into subatomic levels. There are three basic principles in quantum theory, which are as follows:

First - Neutrons, protons and electrons all act as both particles and waves. They can be particles, moving in distinct pathways or orbits, or they can be waves, being more diffused. This ability to become either, to be suspended between both states, is known as a potential.

Second - Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle - Basically, nothing is certain until it is observed. Take a senior high school physics experiment for an example: if you get a double slit paper like below,
And fire a paintball gun at it, the bullets should spatter the surface behind the double slit paper in a pattern like this, which is the pattern a particle would make.
But, if you shine a torchlight through the slits, the light will diffract to show a pattern like this (Light is a form of electromagnetic wave).
Now, if you take an electron gun and fire it through the double slit to a phosphorescent surface, what you'd get is the pattern of the waves. Imagine, electrons traveling as waves. After this, if you place a clicker that beeps whenever it detects the passage of a electron, and switch on the electron gun again, the diffraction pattern immediately switches to that of the particles. It does not work in a larger world, but it does when it comes to subatomics.

Third - As shown in the Heisenberg experiment above, the way to collapse the potential to one side or the other is to measure it. The electrons, once measured by quantity passing through the double slits, immediately changed from waves to particles. And the act of observing and measuring is carried out by the environment.

The subatomic particles in the universe, in our body, even, are constantly under measurement from the environment - that's why we remain, well, us.

Introspection

2010-01-22T04:52:00.000-08:00

I'm the kinda guy who reflects on things most of the time. That's 'cause most of the time, I had no one to talk to. So I talk to myself. My mother says its abnormal, but I think its okay if you only do so around people you know very well (and whom knows you well enough, too).

Anything that crosses your mind deserves introspection, I can tell you that. I believe that thoughts don't flit through your mind without reason, that synapses don't fired in our brains in a certain sequence randomly. Therefore, your thoughts - and even your dreams - are definitely worth pondering over.

Through it, people can learn to see things more differently. Its not for better or for worse, just... different. Some may learn to be better at looking into the minutiae, some may become more adept at spotting the overall trend. Its a bit like observing a forest - some can see the patterns taken by the veins of leaves on each tree, whilst others can spot the distribution of species across the landscape.

One more thing about introspection is that I can ditch every restraint upon myself and actually accept views and thoughts with what logic I had. Plainly speaking, I debate with my alter personality or ego, then embrace the outcome even if it contrasts strongly with my previous views and opinions. The reason for that, I suppose, is that I could shed my pride and accept my own criticisms with grace - something I might not have done willingly if the change of mind is brought about by another person.

I have only one gripe about thinking to myself, though - it happens too fast and too randomly. Not for nothing do they say that thoughts "flit". So sometimes, you'd need a pen and paper, or some other means to record it down, then analyze and interpret it later.

Be as it may, introspection helped me a lot throughout my short life thus far. It never fails me, never cease to surprise me.

Elder

2010-01-06T20:32:00.000-08:00

Oh, how I loved him.
He has everything I could wish for in myself - attractive looks, charming personality, good physique. But I don't love him because of that. I love him because he's him.

Oh, how I hated him.
His arrogance, his laziness, his bullshit. He thinks he's a demigod, one who doesn't even have to care about his godly parents, not to mentioned the "petty mortals". He thinks he doesn't need to give a damn about his family, refuses to share any responsibilities, and knows only to point the finger of blame at others instead of sharing the guilt or help make things right. The only thing he wants is to have things done his way

Oh, how I hated that I loved him.

Who?

My brother. My darling, younger, spoilt brat brother.

The Traveller

2010-01-01T00:53:00.000-08:00

I could scarcely believe my eyes as I opened them. As I got up from the bed I was lying on, I had to rub them to make sure I was not hallucinating. I wasn't.

I am standing in what looked like the first floor of a log cabin. The walls, the floor, and the ceiling were all made of strong hardwood. From a window beside the cot I can make out the outline of trees, as well as hear the song of the birds, but there is too little light for me to see more clearly. It must be near dawn, I thought.

The next thing I noticed about are my clothes. They're not the usual T-shirt-and-jeans I'm used to. In their place was a green tunic, a dark red vest over it, black pants held by a wide belt, the leggings tucked snugly into a pair of felted high boots.

But it still doesn't explain how I got here. As I screw up my eyes in concentration, I began to remember exactly what happened before I woke up in this strange place...

* * * *

"Yup, we'll definitely be late for English lesson."

I made that remark to Him Soon, my classmate, as we headed back to the classroom after finishing an experiment in the lab during Biology. He simply shrugged, as if saying that it cannot be helped. Outside, it was getting dark - flashes of lightning indicated that it would be raining soon. As we got near a group of classmates strolling and chatting in front of us, Him Soon veered left out of the shaded corridor to cut a path to another one opposite the canteen. I followed suit, but did not go further than five steps before something happened to me.

I looked upwards, just in time to see a lightning bolt zigzagging its path down - towards me. I glanced at Him Soon, now several paces away and barely noticing anything wrong afoot, then stared transfixed at the lightning as it drove straight towards my chest. It felt like being hammered with a wrecking ball. I hardly registered the boom of thunder before everything went black.

* * * *

So I was struck unconscious by the lightning, but that still doesn't explain how I'd end up here, I thought while examining my body for any signs of injuries. Not a scar remained, even those acquired from incidents in the past. When I touched my face, it felt smooth, not pimply. And I'm not wearing glasses either, even though I see clearly, which is weird for a guy who's 1000-plus degree myopic. The only mark on my body appears to be the red stains on the fingers of my right hand that I got for dipping them in eosin solution during the biology experiment.

Sudden footsteps alerted me to the presence of another guy in this cabin. It came up from the small flight of steps opposite the corner where I was. Mentally bracing myself, I awaited the unknown person to come up to me.

Up came someone wearing a brown, heavily-cowled robe, with its hood up. He faced me, silent, as if scrutinising me. Without warning, he threw back his hood. Underneath, his face was that of a Buddhist monk, Eastern in appearance, with a bald scalp, long eyebrows, and a thin scar that runs down the cleft of his left chin.

"Welcome back, Traveller," he spoke.

Traveller. As that very word reverberated around my head, memories that were long locked away flooded my mind. At first, the staggering amount of recollections nearly had me down on my knees, comprehending only brief snatches of it - facing off a red wyrm, wielding a bone scimitar that bursts into flames, talking to a band of warrior-women - however, gradually I began to make sense of those seemingly alien reminiscences, but which were actually my own. The instant I understood everything, I opened my eyes again, this time with a new certainty.

I am a Traveller, a walker of planes, an explorer of worlds. With the arrogance of deities, I am one of them whom alter realms and create places as they are now because of our actions. Some of us prefer order - others had an affinity for chaos. There are no rules that could bind us, yet we are held more tightly in chains than they who know nothing of our existence. None, except one of our own, can know our true identity. No one, I realised as I gazed back at Raijin, the monk who initiated and introduced me as Traveller several lifetimes ago.

"They'll be saddened by your departure. I'm sorry to bring you in this way, but certain matters of urgency require your ways to be put into use again."

"I wish to at least offer them comfort," I said.

"...Very well,"

* * * *

Extending my mind using psionics, I touched the minds of everyone I loved, anyone who grieved my 'passing'. My parents were especially anguished, and it pained me to feel the keening of their hearts and yet being unable to tell them in person that I'm okay.

Instead, through an empathy link, I had only offered them solace, reassurance that things would end up alright if they would move on. Withdrawing from their minds, I prayed - though to whom, I know not - that they would continue their lives with acceptance.

* * * *

Returning to the cabin, Raijin's temporary residence in Orb, I found nobody left in side, but stowed away in a chest right in the middle of a room were the possessions of all my identities. After putting them on - separately - the bottom of the chest reveals my next destination. Inscribed on it was a rose with one leaf and its blossom between the two horns of a crescent moon. A ghost of a smile tugged at the corner of my lips as I consider the company that I would find there.

House of June, I thought, here I come.

The Clique

2009-11-01T01:01:00.000-07:00

I have to concede, its a good thing our school doesn't have superstars. Here, everybody is well-known, one way or the other, but even though we stick to our own groups, we kinda know everybody else - thats about 500 guys or more, just in our own year.

In other places, there are some guys and girls in a clique so powerful and popular, others cannot afford NOT to voice their open dislike for any of those "pop kids". That's 'cause if they retaliate, the less popular ones will be in serious trouble - isolated by the rest of the school population. Here are a couple of rules that exists for joining such a terrible group.

#1 - Be daring, outstanding, mean, aloof, anything that allows you to defy the norm and regime yet runs along the lines of The Group's so-called "style".
#2 - Stand your ground and lift your chin, no matter how others challenged you. Stare down the challengers. Winners gain in reputation, losers diminish in stature.
#3 - Be ruthless. Somebody brings up your ire, make sure they go down in flames. Make sure other people fear you, admire you, respect you. And in that order.

That said, I don't think I wanted to be in such a group. If I'm crazy enough, I'll probably find other equally insane guys to bring them down. If I can find such people, that is.

Green Rooftops

2009-10-17T01:26:00.000-07:00

Man really know how to make hell. Try checking out your rooftop to see how many animals or plants that are there. Your answer: most probable NONE. Even a desert would be teeming with cactuses, arachnids, and jerboas. But no, not on a rooftop.

That's why the "green rooftop" movement spreads throughout the world, particularly accross Europe. The idea is plain - you make buildings with flat roofs, heap a couple layers of some materials, including insulators and composite soil on it, and then you start planting. In essence you take a plot of land to buuild for your needs, then you return it to nature.

This, along with the curbing of high-rise buildings (only developing countries favor really tall buildings to show off their cities nowadays) are among the initiatives developed cities have taken. Imagine, your rooftop turned into a garden which supports buttterflies, bees, and a myriad of other animals, or transformed into an orchard where you can pick tomatoes and limes for the day's meal.

I apologise for the lack of photos, but search "Green Rooftops" on any search engine, and I'm sure the pictures that came out on the Internet will guarantee to make you smile. For these rooftop gardens aren't just environmentally friendly or economic, they're also beautiful.

Something I've Learned from Reading A Random Book This Week

2009-10-01T00:08:00.000-07:00

You want to make people die a horrible death? Try this: give him/her the ultimate antibiotic that destroys absolutely every microorganism in the human body. AIDS, common cold, pneumonia, influenza viruses, cancer cells, you name it, the drug destroys it. Side effect - massive diarrhoea because of total lost of good miicroorganism in his/her intestines.

Why? Because the human body's immunity system is already capable of warding off most attacks of disesase. Apply this super-antibiotic, and the immunity system collapse completely within days, because the human body thought there's no longer a need for it. Now if you take of the antibiotic, the human body will not be able to fend off any attacks of disease from microorganisms.

Give people this drug for a couple of months, and they'll say their sickness was cured. Completely. Then you take of the drug. Within hours, they will succumb to diseases totally unobserved-of in medical history and die most horribly.

Call me a psychopath, if you want to.

Source: Andromeda Strain

Double C in School Means Co-curricularly Cool: The End

2009-09-19T01:28:00.000-07:00

Finally, I get to post this up. Been meaning to do this for ages but was held back by too many flaming rules...

Its time. To take the responsibilities off my shoulders, to hand it to someone else, to step down, to let others take the mantle. Five years I've served (okay, participated) in the organizations of my school, and four out of those five, I have been given the responsibility of leading others and teaching them. But its time for us elders to get our pensions, as my friend Troy said, so we hand over our stuffs, sat back and reap the benefits of Double C for nigh on five years.

All this time, many friends were made, promises made, broken, or re-fulfilled. I cherish the time we spent together as comrades, working for the same goal. Thanks to them, I've learn far more than I ever would in a lifetime on my own.

This is now. The end.

Gonna miss u people when we go our separate ways. But that's the way it is. We met, we stayed, we left.

Am I Racist?

2009-08-24T00:05:00.000-07:00

If you're anyone close to me (read "friends") you'd probably answered that question with a "Like, duhh..." But recently, I find myself not that sure anymore.

Yep, I woulda leap at the chance to get outta here, to see the world, to leave this percieved unjust and corruption. Yet, for all of its pollution, this place is still my home, a place where my family belongs. I may go to the ends of the earth, but in the last days of my life, I'll spend it here, with the people I cared for the most.

That's why when I see unity for all its simple beauty, I was moved. Perhaps the wrongs can be made right, after all. I sincerely hope that is the case, for no one would hope to live in a place that did not deserved to be called home.

So maybe I'm not racist after all. I'm...... just concerned and frustrated.

(Perhaps you see this as a lie, instead of whatever I intended it to be. No matter. I have no quarrels with you. But, if by chance we can no longer access this blog in the future, it means that some higher authority has agreed with you.)

Opposites, Versuses, Againsts

2009-07-27T02:13:00.000-07:00

Come to think about it, just about everything in this world has an equal and opposite element to it. Science has art, life has death, earth has sky, and even our brains have left and right hemispheres (which control the opposite side of the body).

Taoism perfectly describes the phenomenon with the "yin-yang" concept - with every manifestation of active (yang) power, there's a passive (yin) power to control it. Its a cycle with neither beginning nor end. Sometimes, some factors may went over the edge, while others were suppressed until they were not able to cope, but Mother Nature has a way to restore balance. Given enough time, Her agents and mechanics can return things to how it should be.

But humans have a differnet view on how "balanced" their surroundings should be. They tipped the scale, not just in their favour, but way into their desires. They created imbalance so that their lusts could be satiated, then they requested for evermore. In the process, actions that could destroy our own beloved Home, were committed to the extent that natural regen will be too late for mankind. One can only hope to attribute a little at a time, the best they can, to help heal the world so that the next generation will not inherit the consequences of their fathers' wrongs.

Are we too late?

Decipher - Break the code.

2009-07-15T23:46:00.000-07:00

IMHO, deciphering coded messages and breaking passwords that are not meant for you is a serious violation of privacy. If people keep things hidden, they do it because its in their best interest. So if we were to do this, we must ensure that it IS for good, that our conscience would not be stained by guilt for it.

"Blue Wolf"

Remember the story? Well, if you haven't, click the link later. Because the two words are not just the title of the stories, they are also a pseudonym I used during my time online. Can you figure out another meaning within? How would you do it?

Codes were invented when people needed to interact with each other, but faced inconvenience in direct communication. Maybe a lad wanted to express his feelings to his lover with a billet-doux, but was afraid of the parents discovering his intentions. Or maybe an undercover agent needed to pass messages on terrorist activities without being blown. Thus, cipher systems were invented. The corresponding de-code system would then be used to reveal meaning in what seemed to be gibberish. An example is the Morse code (which the uninitiated might think to be plain dots). But such systems have a common flaw - given enough time and resources, the system can be cracked. With the speed of today's supercomputers, many entities can break such codes in a matter of minutes.

But I guess that ain't helping you here. After all, this is a personal code, without a system to refer to, and its not even a random computer-generated-phrase. So, in order to comprehend it, you need to know its composer's psyche well. Here are a couple of hints to get you along:

~ I'm emo (or used to be).
~ I left some words about me in the blog. Look around.
~ I am proficient enough in both Chinese and English languages for competent application in daily life (Forgive my seeming lack of modesty).

Post a comment, or leave a note on my Cbox, on what have you deciphered from the two words above. If you get my "name within name" correct, I'll have to hand it to you, you're either a brilliant psychologist, or you already were my closest friend the moment you knew of my existence.

Then again, who said you couldn't be both?

Doomsday+4 : Reincarnation

2009-07-15T00:04:00.000-07:00

Dismantle my being.
Decimate my name.
Efface my memories.
Destroy my spirit.
Obliterate my soul.

Break me into pieces, then fling them far and wide. Scatter the fragments that once formed who I was. Annihilate me, so that I may become more than me.

Let me be reborned

- ZT

My Doomsday-like Prophecy of Myself

2009-07-11T02:14:00.001-07:00

- "I have known people who would ask why I had a crew cut just so they could gossip it about, but whom would also stand in front of me if I sever my wrist and do nothing but sneer with contempt and disgust as they watched me bleed to death"

- "When people need my help, there I am, materializing out of thin air. Otherwise, for all purposes, I might as well have been invisible."

- "So here's a challenge for you - prove to me that life is still worth living to me, and I'll do it, I'll live on, if only for you, and you alone."

- ZT

Clash, Crash, Brash.

2009-06-11T01:46:00.000-07:00

If you told me, five months ago, that my parents would have a major clash with me, I'd laugh it off with a shrug to match. But now, seriously, a row with dad and mum is in order. And its because of co-curriculum.

Okay, its not just that, but also because I made a stupid mistake. I'd claimed last year that the activities should be over by April, but now I'm continuing past May. My parents, concerned as they are about my graduation exams, naturally pushed me quite hard. Of course, this escalates into a conflict, with me looking like the losing side, if your views count.

I know I made a stupid mistake in promising before knowing full well of the future, so I'm sorry. But still, I hope they can be in my shoes, see my point of view. I think I've been striven to aim for the academic pinnacle since tender age, and this makes me feel really stressed-out, around these times, when teen hormones would tempt you do outrageous things. But, I still care for my books too, still know that that yellow scroll is a key to a better future. I promise (for real this time) that I will do whatever in my power to ensure that my SPM results are nothing but airborne colours.

Then again, a request - please don't ground me for too long - that's why I'm not blogging for 3 months straight.

P.S. Another night jaunt at school during 7th and 8th of June. Guess what I saw this time? A 7-inch-long, black monocled cobra. My friend Troy nearly got bitten as he swung his left foot over its head when I tried to shove him out of the way. Guess the fella's not yet awake. When we alerted the school guard, though, its in threat mode - neck flattened, fangs out, body coiled and ready to lash out, eyeing the most threatening guy in vicinity - my buddy whom had an appendage near its head before it was completely alert.

Double C in School means Co-curricularly Cool: Night Jaunt

2009-03-18T06:11:00.000-07:00

2009 marks the last year of my 'Double C' life, so I decide to continue my annual practice of staying at school for the nights during consecutive days of co-curricular activities. Not even the recent rule that forbids us students to sleep at school without permission could deny me. So, I found a couple of friends with the same interests, and we spent a total of 3 nights out at school. Here's a day-by-day recap of the three things happened during our jaunt:

Day 1:
The Good - "No pain, no gain". I learned what its like to sleep just two hours in the night. We spent the rest of it playing basketball in semi-darkness, walking for miles until our slipper-clad feet had blisters, and listened to music from MP3 players and handphones until I doze off at 5 and woke up 7 in the morning .
The Bad - Even after I fell asleep, I still woke up every 15 minutes or so by the sting of mosquitoes. Those buggers won't leave my bare shins alone!
The Ugly - We were spotted by an assistant headmaster on our way out of school at 10pm - he made the guards note down our names when we came back. What effect this may have, I do not know until school reopens.

Day 2:
The Good - Caught up on some sleep. Man, I really went off to dreamland the milisecond lights are off and my head touches my makeshift pillow. We also had the best meal amongst the nights, which is counted a feast when you considered the limited choices we have in camp mealfare.
The Bad - Half of my friends I counted on to bunker at school went home instead. They're too tired to survive another "wild night out", and I was too tired to argue.

Day 3:
The Good - Participated in the School Youth Camp campfire. Our unit added the Best Performance Award as the first outside trophy in many years to our cabinet, thanks to our live band performers (who'd only practice for about 5 hours).
The Bad - Really lousy weather. It rained so hard we didn't get to recieve the award in a formal prize-giving ceremony. The campfire had been called off at about 10.30 pm due to the torrent.
The Cute - Found a real live bat hanging on a section of the ceilling as I walked under that section of a corridor. Apparently the little thing got stranded in the rain and seeked shelter under a nook to wait until the storm went away.

There you have it. Call me an uneccessary risk-taker if you will, but I'm enjoying every illegal moment of my night jaunt at school.

Compassion in Basketball - Read it, Then Pass it Around

2009-02-20T05:08:00.002-08:00

Got this on Yahoo! some time ago, but was busy so I dropped it. Now being a permanent post on my blog, hope this will give you some thought after reading.

The coach never considered any other option.

It didn't matter that his DeKalb, Ill., High School basketball team had ridden a bus two and a half hours to get to Milwaukee, then waited another hour past game time to play. Didn't matter that the game was close, or that this was a chance to beat a big city team.

Johntel Franklin scored 10 points in the game following the loss of his mother.Something else was on Dave Rohlman's mind when he asked for a volunteer to shoot two free throws awarded his team on a technical foul in the second quarter. His senior captain raised his hand, ready to go to the line as he had many times before.

Only this time it was different.

"You realize you're going to miss them, don't you?" Rohlman said.

Darius McNeal nodded his head. He understood what had to be done.

It was a Saturday night in February, and the Barbs were playing a non-conference game on the road against Milwaukee Madison. It was the third meeting between the two schools, who were developing a friendly rivalry that spanned two states.

The teams planned to get together after the game and share some pizzas and soda. But the game itself almost never took place.

Hours earlier, the mother of Milwaukee Madison senior captain Johntel Franklin died at a local hospital. Carlitha Franklin had been in remission after a five-year fight with cervical cancer, but she began to hemorrhage that morning while Johntel was taking his college ACT exam.

Her son and several of his teammates were at the hospital late that afternoon when the decision was made to turn off the life-support system. Carlitha Franklin was just 39.

"She was young and they were real close," said Milwaukee coach Aaron Womack Jr., who was at the hospital. "He was very distraught and it happened so suddenly he didn't have time to grieve."

Womack was going to cancel the game, but Franklin told him he wanted the team to play. And play they did, even though the game started late and Milwaukee Madison dressed only eight players.

Early in the second quarter, Womack saw someone out of the corner of his eye. It was Franklin, who came there directly from the hospital to root his teammates on.

The Knights had possession, so Womack called a time out. His players went over and hugged their grieving teammate. Fans came out of the stands to do the same.

"We got back to playing the game and I asked if he wanted to come and sit on the bench," Womack said during a telephone interview.

"No," Franklin replied. "I want to play."

There was just one problem. Since Franklin wasn't on the pre-game roster, putting him in meant drawing a technical foul that would give DeKalb two free throws.

Though it was a tight game, Womack was willing to give up the two points. It was more important to help his senior guard and co-captain deal with his grief by playing.

Over on the other bench, though, Rohlman wasn't so willing to take them. He told the referees to forget the technical and just let Franklin play.

"I could hear them arguing for five to seven minutes, saying, `We're not taking it, we're not taking it," Womack said. "The refs told them, no, that's the rule. You have to take them."

That's when Rohlman asked for volunteers, and McNeal's hand went up.

He went alone to the free throw line, dribbled the ball a couple of times, and looked at the rim.

His first attempt went about two feet, bouncing a couple of times as it rolled toward the end line. The second barely left his hand.

It didn't take long for the Milwaukee players to figure out what was going on.

They stood and turned toward the DeKalb bench and started applauding the gesture of sportsmanship. Soon, so did everybody in the stands.

"I did it for the guy who lost his mom," McNeal told the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. "It was the right thing to do."

"They may not remember our record 20 years from now, but they'll remember what happened in that gym that night," said Dave Rohlman, head coach of the opposing DeKalb team on what his players will take away from this experience.

Franklin would go on to score 10 points, and Milwaukee Madison broke open the game in the second half to win 62-47. Afterward, the teams went out for pizza, two players from each team sharing each pie.

Franklin stopped by briefly, thankful that his team was there for him.

"I got kind of emotional but it helped a lot just to play," he said. "I felt like I had a lot of support out there."

Basketball is a second sport for the 18-year-old Franklin, who says he has had some scholarship nibbles and plans to play football in college. He just has a few games left for the Knights, who are 6-11 and got beat 71-36 Tuesday night by Milwaukee Hamilton.

It hasn't been the greatest season for the team, but they have stuck together through a lot of adversity.

"We maybe don't have the best basketball players in the world but they go to class and take care of business," Womack said. "We have a losing record but there's life lessons going on, good ones."
None so good, though, as the moment a team and a player decided there were more important things than winning and having good stats.

Yes, DeKalb would go home with a loss. But it was a trip they'll never forget.

"This is something our kids will hold for a lifetime," Rohlman said. "They may not remember our record 20 years from now, but they'll remember what happened in that gym that night."

Son: A True CNY Story

2009-01-28T18:34:00.001-08:00

I had bore witness to this touching experience on two days before Chinese New Year, and decided to tell it to you. Please bear with me if I cannot portray the story well, and please, reflect on it for just a few moments when you finished.

There was an elderly lady, who had worked hard all her life to raise her children. Now, she desires to live in a Buddhist temple with the nun and the other old tenants, rather than staying at home all day with nothing to do, having boredom gnawing at her. Her son, wanting only happiness for his mother, obliged. He would spend every weekend afternoon taking his family to visit her. In a way, the lady was content.

This went on for some months, until the eve of Chinese New Year was around the corner. Wanting to spend the New Year with his mother, he had arranged and convinced the lady to stay with his wife's family and celebrate the New Year together. The lady agreed, much to his family's delight.

However, when the day came, the old lady had a change of mind. She declined the offer to go, saying, "I'm old now, too frail for traveling. Let me spend the New Year in here instead, where it'll be more peaceful and quiet. Go, go without me. I am content here." Dismayed, her son tried to talk her to go, but the lady persisted. Her grandson, the eldest of the man, aided his father in the attempt, but to no avail. When the leading nun of the temple joined in to the lady's side, both father and son knew that they are losing the battle.

The lady's son finally conceded. Wishing his mother a happy Chinese New Year, he turned to prepare his family for the journey to his in-laws place. The eldest grandson thought he glimpsed tears in his father's eyes, and his heart was filled with sorrow. During the moment when both father and son were alone, the shy teen stepped up and wanted to hug his father, for nothing more than silent comfort, but he hesitated, and the moment passed.

Silently, the boy vowed never to have the same dilemma to ever happen to his own parents, for their sake, and his own. He glanced back one more time to his grandmother as they departed, eyes stinging because of the tears he held back.

Here was a son who cannot fulfilled his wish of having his own mother spending Chinese New Year with him. Would you spend more time with your own parents if you had the choice?

Never been Better

2009-01-18T01:03:00.000-08:00

Again, its the time of the year when I'd get to ignore my main occupation and focus instead on my secondary work with all impunity. Te fact that this year marks the final test of the second study stage of my life makes no significance to me at all. To me, the impact will only hit after April, when the dust of battles have settled down. So, lets get our hands dirty, guys.

Twice a week, we stayed back after school and drilled while the rays of the sun rained down on us non-stop. Every evening, we went back home feeling exhausted, yet adrenaline would pushed us on to continue our studies with vigour. Basically, we're living on steroids produced by our own bodies, fueled by exhilaration and the determination to succeed in the upcoming battle.

Does it matter when our feet got roasted in our shoes while we stand motionless? Does it matter when our hands burn on the tarmac road? Does it matter when we cheer ourselves hoarse in a fit of narcissism? Well, maybe it tugs at our conscience for a few minutes, but in the end, we'd knew it'll be worth it all, just to be part of it, when the time comes.

This is where we belonged, as we are finding and proving ourselves in this gruelling preparation. We knew for certain that when the dust settles, we'll have to wage another kind of battle on our own. But we will look back to this moment in the forseeable future, as we remember the victory - even if we should fail in the end - brought by the sweat on our brow, and the strength of our backs, with pride.

Who are We to Judge?

2008-12-17T00:43:00.000-08:00

As it is, there are lots of things shunned by the norm of our societies. Marrying one's teacher, for example, would definitely be shocking news indeed to those who know of it. But as people's minds are progressing, some parts of the so-called "norm" were abolished. Still, too much remains. There are some things that were of no bad consequence at all, yet still banished by the people in general simply because they cannot stand the insult to their long-standing beliefs.

For some instance, when presented with an idea that proved better than the "society norm" way, most people will simply reject it because "Its simply not the way it should be." Especially when these ideas involve "untouchable" issues.

Truly, tradition did arise from generations of accumulated wisdom, but sometimes, why not rebel against it if the act is logical? After all, there are some aspects in tradition that could be refined so as to adapt to the difference in modern lives. I would not want to offend anyone by disrespecting the old ways, but I hope that being skeptical and logical in life would be far better than being a tad superstitious. There may be boundaries that are set for our good, but there are also boundaries that are made to be pushed against if we were to achieve new heights in the world.

In the end, the point is: who are we to judge others simply because they are different? We are but fellow people compared to them, just less... eye-catching. So we should just accept people for who they are, while changing things that can be changed for the better.

One and One is Two.

2008-12-01T04:44:00.000-08:00

Light : Right, let's start talking.
Dark : (Bored) Just get this over with quickly.
Light : Don't you ever think that this might do us good?
Dark : Do you?
Light : ... We have to confront each other at times, whether or not we want to.
Dark : Keep talking.
Light : (Near exasperation) Sometimes I wish you never existed.
Dark : I'm not as stupid as you. (Light appears affronted) Whenever there's me, there's bound to be you. Without you, there's no way left to express me.
Light : True. Heights are nothing if not for the depths they towered over. Yet sometimes, why are the depths preferred?
Dark : Maybe its because the heights are already so full, people were pushed off to the depths all the time. Therefore they'd chose to stay in the depths, for that place never gets crowded.
Light : Who judges that?
Dark : Nobody does, but everybody executes it.
Light : Are there other reasons?
Dark : Yes. Some people were born suffused with my, let's say, "touch". They chose my path delibrately, for reasons only they themselves, and no other, can fathom.
Light : Yet many walk beside you because they were coerced, forced, or belied to.
Dark : Of course, I do not deny that. But how many more had walked beside you simply out of resignation, simply because that is their so-called "norm"?
Light : (At loss for words)
Dark : (Continuing without missing a beat) Those who chose to walk by my side, willingly, know exactly what they are doing. Can you say the same of those who do so beside you?
Light : Well... almost.
Dark : ... Yet, my kind are the ones shunned, for you are the chosen one.
Light : (Seizing the opportunity) And why? Because we are doing forever better than you could ever achieve. Our actions may differ, but you would never take my path because you can't, whilst I do so because I chose not to.
Dark : Empty words. If a man walks beside either of us to with his own soul, he did so with his very choice, not with any outer coercion. I do not deny that you can overcome me, but it was long known that you would never vanquish me.
Light : We are made to do this forever, then.
Dark : No. As you said, our paths differ. Only when our paths cross do we clash. For now, though, our paths have diverged. Until we meet again.
Light : (Looked around as darkness descended. Saw nothing of Dark when light returns.) Until we meet again, then. Forgot to tell you that some people fear me more than they fear you, because I hold more unknowns than you, because I blind people without a cure, whereas they can see what is within your folds.
Dark : (Very faint) That would be the irony. Oh, by the way, the one who crossed our paths by deliberation? He walks by me.
Light : As he wishes.

Expert's e-Village. Wow.

2008-11-12T01:46:00.000-08:00

Have you ever wanted to learn something fancy that'll catch someone's eye, or simply just to know something you've taken an interest in? Then if you haven't know about this, here's one place that may help you attain some knowledge through watching videos - and no, I'm not talking about YouTube. No, actually, its Expert Village.

YouTube was never my cup of tea, since most of the videos I've seen there didn't leave much of a meaning to me - but that was for another post entry. Back to Expert Village. Why is it special to me? For one basic reason - you get good-quality videos from people on any topic under the sun, from keeping scores in tennis, to hip-hop dance moves, to organising beauty pageants. Yes, you didn't get the last one wrong. How cool is that?

Another reason, is that those videos are really produced, uploaded by, and approved by, professionals. If you doubt it, there's an article below every video that shortly describes the experts on the video, such as their occupations, their academic achievements, and such.

Unfortunately, I can't find a way to embed a video or two onto this post entry, due to problems with the HTML scripts. So instead, try to visit the site yourself when you have the time. Trust me, its worth taking your time to sign up to the site, then search for videos on any thing that came accross your mind.

Currently, I'm watching its featured video on how to do a magic pen trick. Anyway, this goes on to show us that the Internet has a treasure trove for us if we presevere. Sometimes, we simply have to look under every nook and cranny, until we looked into the right place, and voila, there it is for our taking.

That, I think, would be one of the many good things about the Internet - when you have a sense of adventure as you dive into the sea of knowledge.

"Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get on your next bite." I guess the same goes for the Internet.

The Blue Wolf (Part 6)

2008-09-30T01:51:00.000-07:00

Dusk. Ryanne sat resolutely in front of the cave, the place where she had met the mysterious rogue, Iatn. She sat, with patience she'd learned from him, determined to wait for him to appear and tell her the truth he promised her.

She was just about to give up when his voice rang out.

"So you're still here."

"Iatn!"

Ryanne couldn't help but cried out in joy, seeing him coming out of the shadows. She was close enough to hear him muttering, "Too bloody inquisitive for her own good." She didn't mind that.

"I suppose you want to hear my story now, so make yourself comfortable and listen carefully, because I'd only tell this once." That got Ryanne's ears pricked up. Se took her usual place, lying beside Iatn, as he started recounting the his life to this future fellow Traveller.

* * *

"I am once an Alpha-" Ryanne gasped, not out of surprise, but rather out of awe, "-I led my pack with my mate for some seasons. We had a good life - food was plentiful, the neighbouring packs were respectful to us as we were to them, and such. "

"Then, they came. Who they are, not one of us knows. They are not natural. These - monsters -" Iatn spat the word with absolute hatred, "- They destroyed our homes. They held me, watching helplessly as my mate, my brood was slain before my very eyes. Then, they release me, and vanish without a trace. "

"Ever since then, I've been travelling, moving from one place to the next, searching for them, wanting to avenge my pack or die in the process. Yet, I have found no scent, no trace, no sign of them. But during my travels, something happened to me. This had grown on me."

As Iatn spoke the last words, he reared up. Ryanne gasped as she saw a mark on his body, so familiar because she wore it herself on her right paw. On Iatn's stomach, lined in blue fur of lighter hue, was a newborn moon, under which a river of stars flow. Even though Iatn lay perfectly still, the flowing stars seemed ever undulating moving in front of Ryanne's eyes as patches of blue fur on Iatn's body changed hue to suit the movements of the celestial bodies. Ryanne's own symbol was much smaller, but it shared the similarity that the symbol moved too.

Once Iatn had laid down, he continued, "Wit this... symbol on my body, I found that I slowly became stronger, faster, physically better. There are other changes," He added when he saw curiosity in Ryanne's eyes, "But theos are for each Bearer, each Traveller to find out."

"What-" Ryanne began, but Iatn cut her short. "Now, let me finish my tale first. All will be told in time." When she fell silent' he continued, "At last, I found the desecrators of my pack in a faraway and desolate place. With my newfound strength, I defeated them, though not without undue effort. Since then, I have been wandering around, searching for you."

"For me?"

"Why yes, Ryanne. Now that I've found you, I now know that you are, not yet ready. For now, your life will not be troubled - trust me, that I will come for you again, and take you to the place where you will truly belong."

"But I belonged here-" Ryanne's protest died away when she realized that Iatn was no longer there. Not by stealth and speed - for she knew that no wolf can just slipped away beside another like what Iatn did. Ryanne had so many questions she'd want Iatn to answer, but now, she would have to wait for another time.

Looking out towards the moon, Ryanne silently made a promise. "We will meet again, Iatn. I trust you." Then, she padded back to her home, her right paw tingling as her own symbol flows.

The Blue Wolf (Part 5)

2008-09-25T03:52:00.000-07:00

No sooner then his foe twitched his last at his feet than he'd found himself surrounded - by her mother's pack. He didn't even needed his senses to tell him that he could never break through their ranks alive.

Her mother - Shyle - stepped forward, tail high in the air, fangs slightly bared. Wisely, he kept his tail down. She watched him anxiously, hoping that he may have a chace of walking out of this contingency alive, slim chance though it seems.

"Who are you? Why are you here?" asked Shyle.

"I am called Iatn - " Finally, she'd known his name! " - And I am a rogue. The reason that I wandered this deep into your territory was because I am hunting."

"These humans?" scoffed Shyle. "They are worthy enough as your prey?" Iatn did not answer, waiting for Shyle's next remark.

Then, suddenly, Shyle's glare soften as she glanced at her daughter the rogue had saved. "While no rogue who penetrates our territory this deep should be left alive, I am not ungrateful of what you did, for you saved my daughter's life." "Yet," she continued, "No wolf that does not belong in this pack belongs here. Join us, or leave this place. " There was a murmur of growls during her proclaimation, but Shyle silenced them all with a glare,, then stared back at the rogue. "Its your choice."

Secretly, she'd hoped that he would stay, but his words dashed that hope immediately. "My apologies, but... no."

"Then, good hunting to you," Without another word, Shyle's pack retreated behind her, leaving Iatn free to go. As he turned to leave, she could not help it but pouted. "But..."

"Silence, Ryanne!" Her mother snapped. Iatn, upon hearing the name, turned sowly and gazed at the youngling's eyes, then padded out of sight. Ryanne could only watched as Iatn went in cover and disappear from sight.

The Blue Wolf (Part 4)

2008-09-17T02:53:00.000-07:00

The tension is nearly palpable. To Shyle's thinking, they were in a disadvantage. In the open, they'd lost their best form of offense and defense. Then there's the matter of their - her - young. No matter whether they win or lose, precious blood will be spilled before the sun rises again. This could bode ill for her pack's future.

She didn't spare much time brroding about this, because the humans were inching closer with each breath she draw. Carefully, she marked each human with their scent, tagged less than a dozen, including two muzzled hounds. With a silent signal, she ordered her pack to be ready. Then, she'd pounced.

As one, half her pack leaped into the bushes, every wolf aiming for their respective targets throats. They know well that this fight has to end as soon as possible, lest they suffer casualties that proved fatal in the long run.

The hound-mastiff's were the first blood shed. Shyle's mate ripped his throat before he'd even release his hold on the dogs' rein and muzzle. With a primal growl, Shyle sent those half-cousins away, tails between knees. Her own target was similarly killed, but one of her wolves was shot through her skull.

Shyle could smell their remaining foes breaking ranks and retreating, and she barked an order to restrain them from giving chase. Too late, she sensed one left still standing. The human was now cocking his gun, aiming it at her beloved daughter, along with the other helpless young. None of her pack, including herself, was near enough to knock him down, rip his throat. Shyle watched, almost helplessly, as the human male pulled back the finger hooking the trigger.

* * *

He was waiting for this all along.

Admittedly, he'd realised soon enough that the humans couldn't have possibly win against such a large, vigilant pack. Yet, he stayed and watched, in case there was something he'd have to do.

There. That's it. The fight was won, right after it had begun. It was two wolves against one man, two wolves as determined to protect their pack as the humans were to completely erradicated the threat to their village. There was no question.

Yet, his target wasn't cowed by the odds. Their was an odd glint in the human's eye, now that he was close enough to observe. Suddenly, he realised it: the look of a creature who also had something held precious destroyed right in front of his eyes.

The human raise his gun, oblivious to the danger. Following the human's aim, his heart jolted when he'd seen the target. Her!

Without a second thought, he pounced, fangs aiming for the back of the human's neck. The force of his leap knocked the human's aim skywards, missing the cluster of young cubs and nearly grazing a wolf in the human's path. Before the human can react, he sink his teeth down on the humans neck, breaking his spine.

The Blue Wolf (Part 3)

2008-09-08T03:14:00.000-07:00

The hunters are closing in on the pack's resting grounds. As they moved, he noticed one of them, a lean, gaunt, bearded man, who moved with a grace and determination that matched the blaze in his eye - the right one was covered by an eye patch. He'd presumed he was blinded. That human was definitely the leader of the ragged group.

He called them "ragged" because aside from their leader, all of them humans would never stand a match against a true wolf. He could tell that these humans were hunting wolves because they need to do it. Her pack probably have been feeding off their lifestock lately, leaving them without a means of food for the coming winter.

No matter. He's a wolf, and though rogues don't normally interfere with problems of another wolf pack, he'd prefer the victory of his own kind against those despicable humans. He'd immediately marked the gaunt leader as his primary target, though he'd need a distraction to close in unawares on the human.

* * *

Shyle lied on her stomach, having eaten a full meal. Her daughter laid beside her, seemingly brooding. Shyle put it as her daughter having a moody fit. Not fitting for being a warrior and alpha in-making. She'd have to find a way to root it out sooner or later.

Little did she know that her daughter was thinking about a rogue she'd been meeting with for some time.

Suddenly, her sentinels let out a warning yip. Humans! Shyle immediately got on guard, followed by her daughter. wondering zhat foolishness caused the humans to track them this far, Shyle nevertheless issued orders to form a protective circle around the young. She will protect her pack, no matter the threat or the outcome, because she hold her family - especially her only daughter who'd survived after birth - dearer to her heart than her life. To forfeit her pack, would mean to forfeit her honour and her life.

As her mate took his place beside her, Shyle dropped, preparing to pounce at the slightest hint of her enemies' whereabouts.

The Blue Wolf (Part 2)

2008-09-04T02:25:00.000-07:00

Autumn. Three months had passed. She came to him a few more times. Sometimes, something caught her attention, and she'd ask curious questions in a neverending stream - he'd answered the all. Other times, both of them just sat or lied close to each other, neither conversing with sound, but with subtle gestures, such as a nod of the snout, a glance, a flare of nostrils. She was still waiting, he knew, for more glimpses about his own life from himself, but he was just as patient. He know the time was not yet then, but it would come soon.

That day had come.

Rising from his midday nap, his instincts immedtiately howled danger. He bounded out of his den, and the scents in the wind confirmed his suspicions. Humans. He bared his teeth as he thought of what he would face soon, grinned inwardly in anticipation at the thought of having to do it.

The humans are moving southeast, towards the den where her family had been resting. Wasting no more time, he loped eastwards, downwind, so that he can track the humans and learn of them.

Let's hunt, he called, to the winds, the the earth, to the skies.

* * *

The humans are lounging on the ground, each and every one of them arming themselves with the guns and nets. He was watching them from afar, and noted that they'd only brought two dogs, which means that these humans weren't capable enough to enlist the aid of more - or dangerously confident in their capabilities.

No matter. Either they'll be scared away, their non-existent tails between their knees, or they will have their throats ripped apart. He slinked away, leaving no noise, no trails, not even scents that can be picked out by the hounds nose.

Now, to set up the scene - and give both sides in the inevitable battle a surprise. For he knew, in his heart of hearts, that these people will not give up the hunting of wolves, ill-equipped they may seem.

The Blue Wolf

2008-09-03T01:17:00.000-07:00

Red sun, yellow skies, orange clouds,
Dawn to all those within darkness shrouded.
Beware,
All brothers and sisters out there,
Cross not the teritory,
Nor the path that I bear.

Sprightly buck, helpless fawn, doe the protector,
Black moose, brown elk, forest conquerors.
All seemed alert and wary,
Yet myself they all overlooked easily.

Blue moon, black night,
Yet another meal that sustain the spark of another's life.
Deep snarl, loud cry,
That freezes all that listens,
As well as those within sight.

Small hill, tall pine,
A howl from the sillhoute that is mine.
Proud nature, cruel fate,
Tonight, who slumbers on,
And who stay awake?

She recited the verse in her heart, as she did so many times before -and, with the silent recital comes the question that finally comes out of the mouth, to the one who composed it, "But...... don't you ever feel lonely?"

He smiled at her, fully understanding that she could not yet comprehend the way he did for the very term 'lonely'. She is too young, after all - barely half his age, and at this time of her life, she's yet to cross the Rubicon and attend the baptism of fire. Still, his instincts told him sound and true - she is special compared to others her age. "Little one, when you lived as I did to my age, you'll learn to appreciate and enjoy being lonely."

"Really?" she sounds unconvinced. "Mama says that all of us will feel that need to mate, to form a pack on time or another. She says that it is what every wolf does."

Sadness flickered across his face, as his remembered his pack, his life in it, and the catastrophe that destroyed it, tearing almost everything he once held dear away from him. But he restrained his thoughts, hiding his emotional turmoil from the youngling in front of him, and said, "Well, I'm not your average wolf, now am I?"

When she did not respond, apparently in thought, he seized the chance and said, "Look, dusk is coming. You wouldn't want your parents to find you missing when they return from their hunting. Go back to your nest now."

When he said that, she'd usually hurry away with a hasty goodbye, but this time, her eyes bore into his for a moment before she opened her mouth, tried to speak, then closed it again with a shake of her head. Then, she turned around and padded away, reluctant to leave.

He watched her form disappeared into the bushes, his blue fur rippling as a breeze played around his form. There's something knowing in his eyes.

She will be back again. And, he will wait until she is mature enough, then he will tell her everything.

VG and Me

2008-08-28T02:17:00.000-07:00

By VG, its video games, be it from the consoles (I own a PlayStation and a PlayStation2), or the PC. Believe me, I started playing VG since I was 5 years old, could install it by 6, and owned at least 15 games before I was in third year of my primary education. It didn't matter to me that 30 percent of the games I owned was not actually suited for my age - I delibrately changed the "blood colour" settings in my first Serious Sam into green to make it look "more realistic".

Now, though, I changed my prefered genre of VG to adventuring RPGs and RTS - role-playing and real-time-strategy for those who didn't know the abbreviations. My favourite? Age of Mythology , Warcraft III (I'd only use it to play DotA, though) , Orochi Warriors (PS2) , and the Digimon World series (2 and 4) , to name a few.

I loved it whenever I executed a move using my character that left his opponent lying and knocked out. I grinned in delight when an opponent army fell for my ruse and was lured out of the safety of his city, only to be completely annihilated by my own, far more superior army. and I simply love it when my Juggernaut just come out and execute a Double Kill in the span of 15 seconds.

Am I addicted?

Nah, I'm just obsessed.

Its what most teens are caught up with, right?

To me, it doesn't matter why I'm so, 'cause I don't think VG is going to be everything in my life. aside from reading and exercising, this proves to be my recreational activity - and one that lets me unleash all of my tension in one go.

So, I'm definitely playing on.

My Greens

2008-08-19T05:45:00.000-07:00

When I came to brood about it on a dreary, moody day, I realized that half the plants grown in my house had already been there since I was a toddler. This means that we grew up under the same roof, cared for by my father. Half brothers, then.

The Cactus - This one stays in my living room all the time. It never gets out to enjoy direct sunlight nowadays, and hardly recieves any water at all. Still, it survives in a less-than-friendly environment. Even without the elements much plants would need to grow out of seedhood, it continues to stand proud, teaching me to not be down.

The Orchid - The subspecies that my father cares about the most, these orchids are beautifully, simple. There is no flair in them, yet they can struck quite a chord in the hearts of those who appreciate it. Still, I 'd like them more if they had fragrance.

The Bonsai - These little pot-plants have been twisted to form shapes my father desires. He uses copperwires to do the job. If you look closely, the stems actualy bulge out from the restricting coils, so the wire now cannot be pulled out ever again. Good thing my own life ain't that twisted, though sometimes I wish it wasn't as restricted.

The Lotus - Ahh, the gentleman of flowers. Surprisingly, their petals fall off soon after the flower blossom. That leaves the stalk in the middle, standing tall above the leaves and swaying in the wind. Its nakedness did nothing to dim its beauty, rather it made me thought otherwise.

So there it is, four amongst the plants that grew up with me. I wasn't much of a plant lover, but its great to just stare at them, take pictures of them, or even smell them - even though the plants are scentless.

One World, One Dream...

2008-07-19T06:05:00.000-07:00

Sigh... As the world prepares for the one-and-only international sports event that's gonna be a blast, I'm stuck preparing for the one thing that sets me back on my heels - the school exams. Yep, at the exactly the 8th of August, Friday, I'm gonna be mentally bracing myself for the paper thats gonna arrive in minutes.

Yet, that cannot even put a damper on my spirits. True, my results will most probably go down, doubtlessly because of me dividing my attetion between exam preparations and watching the Games with the world. Still, I will show my passion, the dream that I share with the world, to the world.

To all those who will compete in the Games, I wish them luck and peace, whatever their results in their competitions. But to those of my own country, Malaysia, I wish them Malaysian atheletes to be able to prove themselves worthy, to be able to open the eyes of those who look down on them, to let us be able to be proud of our nation, our fellow countrymen.

The days leading up to the Beijing Olympics are not exactly peaceful. What with certain political issues, discord has been sown among some factions, riots have appeared on the streets. Still, I believe that the rest of the world would still stand united when they celebrate the upcoming event of all time. I believe that sports should not be connected with politics, and therefore those people who wish to create chaos during the Olympic Games will never succeed, since there are more in the world who share my views.

Finally, let all of us share the dream as we share the world. Let us all celebrate the Olympics as is proper, no matter our skin colour, race or culture

Double C in School means Co-curriculuarlly Cool

2008-07-07T05:47:00.000-07:00

To me, my school life before I turned 14 is pretty much dull and sleepy. That's because my life at school back then would be study, books, and gossip. Not anymore, I say with relish. Now, club activities not only just breathe in some fresh air, they've became the soul of my school life. I'm positively grabbing every opportunity to attend co-curricular activities.

First, there's the club I'm in that sometimes organise social work to let me provide to others, to give rather than take; the days I spent trying to crack a hole in my opponents chess defense while turtling up my own pieces to be as impregnable as possible to any attacks. Finally, there's the days spent in the sun as we drill to our commanders orders. gritting our teeth while drops of sweat sting our eyes and bearing the pain as we do push-ups on the blistering road at 3.00pm. Then onto the competition, when all our training paid off, and the hall echoes with our footsteps as we put all our focus into our performance.

But all in all, the best thing I have found in co-curricular activities is the sense of being, of belonging. Between me and my friends, there's a brotherhood formed by the things we did that bring trust and faith amongst us. It was welded through the "battles" we fought together, tempered by the loyalty we've shown for each other. It never matter who leads, because we know, fully, that everyone was equally important in the team.

With them, I guess I've found the clique where I can truly belong. Maybe this will be the end of me, as the lone Traveller. Then again, perhaps not.

Mad Maths

2008-06-23T23:57:00.000-07:00

I recently read an article that says something 'bout reasoning. Naturally it caught my attention, since i was studying mathematical reasoning just some weeks ago. When I peruse it, it mentions that those reasonings were only usable in maths, and would hardly be useful in practical life. In fact, it uses someexammples that turns out to be very comical. Take a look at this:

Statement 1: A is B.
Statement 2: B is C.
Conclusion: A is C.

A standard example would be:

Statement 1: 8 is a multiple of 2.
Statement 2: A multiple of 2 is a even number.
Conclusion: 8 is a even number.

Now, check this out:

Statement 1: Some boys are Senior High students.
Statement 2: Some Senior High students are girls.
Conclusion: Some boys are girls.

Wow. Impressive. However, once I reconsult my notes, I found a major mistake there. The statements can, and have been in this case, modified by the quantifier "some". That very word can cause the truth value of the trio above to be changed, since the connection between the staements and the conclusions are frayed.

Lesson learned: Next time, be careful about what you hear.

To All Teachers in the World

2008-05-31T03:07:00.000-07:00

Commonly known is the fact that teachers, the engineers of human soul, are a most valued and noble profession. Their price? Neverending subtle work, as they have to mold not just the brain and heart of a youngster, but the future of the whole world. Teachers used to be authority figures in the past, respected by folk all around. About 45 years ago, if a kid or a teen told his/her parents that they've been punished by teachers, the parents would likely give them a beating before apologising to the teacher personally for their children's misbehaviour.

Now, teachers have been put to more of the same level of students. Students' behaviour has now changed drastically. Of course, the respect is still there, but it is more in the mutual sense now. Sudents now usually take to teachers at an early stage, then the relationship can evolved to be two-way, where both teacher and pupil can learn from, and teach, the other.

As with any relationship, if the one between student and teacher went wrong, it usually means that both can do domething to make it better. I know students are more prone to causing the damage, therefore I would like to urge students this - If you're not going on well with your teacher, find a way to like him/her, then make amends to the relationship. After all, teachers will only be with you for 1 year, morfe or less. So appreciate them. You'll never know when you'll thank them to the heavens for their tutoring.

To a Tutor, With the Best Wishes...

2008-05-23T05:31:00.001-07:00

Okay, I know this isn't my typical style of posting, but then, this isn't a normal post. Please at least allow me to pour my heart out, as this serves as a very, very personal background for my next post about the teachers:

Being a co-curricularlly active senior student at my school usually means you're very busy during "special times", including the start of the year. Well, during that time, I've been spending more time at school outside of classes rather than in. The subject that I skipped the most is National Language ( NL) classes. I probably skipped about 5 lessons out of six per week for at least 3 weeks.

And then She came. Miss Helen. She was...... really tiny. Even at below average height when compared to my classmates, I had to lower my sight if we're both standing and going eye-to-eye. You can try to immagine how she'll look beside most of my classmates. Suffice to say, they towered over her. She's a trainee teacher, fresh out of the lecture halls, ready to take a peep at this daunting world of education. Guess what she teaches? Precisely the subject I skipped the most.

My first occuring thought when she walked into the class and introduced herself, "Missy, you're in for a gigantic mess. Not many teacher's 'survive' their trainee period here, so...... (shrugs) Your life ain't gonna be easy. Good luck...... you'll need every bit of it. "

At about mid February, its widely known that she's easy-going enough that some are really tempted to push her to the limits. I had to admit, I was one of those few sometimes. So once, I cracked a joke on something she just said(You know which one, Miss - "leg-cross" is the word). She didn't even wince. That kind of made me raise my eyebrows, in a good way. Since then, I decided to stop myself from getting too far. No good playing this game if you respect someone, and I started to respect her.

And so, I began to start focusing in her class. It was a little late, as mid-March was just around the corner on that time, and she's leaving in late April. Still, her classes are amongst the few I did not skip or sleep in with impunity, to say for my somewhat "rebellious" acts. She was an excellent teacher, willing to both teach and learn from her students. Sometimes, she could inspire some and bring out the best in them. Her only flaw in teaching is her inexperience. She probably needs some time to develop her own "signature style".

Late-April - Her trainee period was over. She left our school at the 25th. For me, something did not feel alright. At the time, it was as if something was missing, or out of place, right...... thear. We still managed to get in contact, though I'm drowned in exam preparations.

Miss Helen left for her hometown at the 5th of May. I considered it my fault for didn't see her off at the airport, since her plane was scheduled to take off after my school hours, as well as the fact that my home was not far from the airport - 15 minutes drive at the most. But then and there, she's leaving, and I am definitely missing her. Undeniably, my original NL teacher teaches far better, yet I'm also irresistably sleeping in her classes, a sign my friend CJ (no, his number is not 7 and he's not blubbery and fluffy) didn't fail to notice. (Heck, I'm falling asleep in most of my classes - Biology, Physics, Moral Education - and I still feel pangs of guilt when I think about it.)

All in all, there's no doubt about me. I've grown to actually...... well, I don't know how to phrase it myself, though "care" seems to be a slightly suitable word for it. Yup, I care about her more than a normal student cares about an average teacher. She is becoming more to me than just a mentor, a tutor. Here's a verse I excerpted and translated from a song, 保佑我 , "Bless Me", for Miss Helen, with the lyrics changed:

Bless her, to be a most distinguished teacher,
Bless me, to be able to cross that horizon to meet her again.
Bless her, so that she'll recognize me when we see each other again,
Bless me, to know her small, lithe form everywhere.
Bless her, to lead a life far happier than mine,
Let her life be blissful and full of laughter and light.

Of Battles, Wars and Fights...

2008-04-16T02:29:00.000-07:00

Battles have been and will always be waging in the universe. Fights have been and will always be fought anywhere, anytime. From the dawn of time, every species of living beings on Earth, have fought rigourously to continue their existence, from the tiniest microbe, to the gigantic dinosaurs, to us, the humans.

Even today, in a civilised human society, there are plenty of causes for fights - a bar brawl, for example, may simply occurs just because someone ate too much peanuts. Sometimes, the fights are not neccessarily physical. Even in our very selves, light and darkness are struggling with each other, as good and evil contest to lay claim to us.

No matter what battles you fight, seldom does the chance occured that you fight to lose. In order to win any battle, you must first know your self, your enemy, your battleground. As Sun Tzu quotes in his Art of War, "To know thy self and thy enemy is the key to win every one of a hundred battles." Knowing the strengths and weaknesses of you and your opponent will allow you to exploit them and gain the upper hand.

Yet, we sometimes lose ourselves in the heat of battle. We got carried away, and we sometimes did things we might regret. "When you're pushed, killing comes as easy as breathing," said Stallone, and its not just the act, or thought, of murder that may come to us. So, we must know, when we are fighting, what exactly are we fighting for, be it to protect others, to test our strength, etc.

For myself, I fight just for the sake of fighting. The strain, the adrenalin, the injuries suffered - they all break the monotony of my life nicely. And as I said, those fights aren't neccessarily physical. The nature of life is that when one battle ends, another will begin in its place. Looks like I wouldn't be stopping anytime soon. Battle on!

Music - Part of My Life, My Soul.

2008-04-12T21:31:00.000-07:00

Alright, anyone out there who'd never listen to music? If so, Then you're either deaf (my sincerest sympathies) or inattentive to the sounds around you. Music isn't just some piece of squiggles on lined papers that maestros write and translate into vibrations of the air, it is simply the feeling you get when you listen to sounds around you, when your heart is at peace or soaring. Music is a universal language for all to hear - it lets you relate to it to others who'd have the same feelings. It is one of the greatest most beautiful things of the world, and you have my greatest sympathies if you cannot appreciate it.

Nature has its own symphonies. Compared to those writen and orchestrated by humans, each and every one of nature's are far grander, more beautiful, more powerful, more terrible, more touching, more...... The list goes on. You get what I mean. It resonates with the very fibre of the core of humans, stikes a chord so deep within us, we'd never realise it until then. The gentle trickling of streams, the rustle of wind-blown leaves , the roar of thunderstorms... these are all the music that Gaia, Mother Nature herself, write and play, and we, as children of the nature, should revel in their presence, and learn to be at one with our All-Mother.

Man-made music had always strived to match nature in that aspect, to produce music and lyrics that are capable to struck that chord in our soul. Some release the wild side within you, some move you to tears, others may have different effects on you. Yet, I believe that if you play out the song with your heart and soul, everyone who would listen could appreciate and relate to it like you do, especially if they had a similar connection to the song as you have, or, just a connection with you. (Try "High School Musical")

Nowadays, popular musical artists are so famous, their lives were on the constant interruption from fans and reporters. Some stray from the path. Instead of producing music because they love to do it, they do it for the money. The fame. Some even go for certain "promotional" pieces in order to sell their music better. Sigh......

Music is one of the passions of life. Yet, some people twisted it for their own perverse gain. As a listener, there's nothing I can do, except listening in silence to the music without bothering what happened to the people involved in its production. I mean, who cares if people boycott a certain artist's song because he/she had a scandal? Just appreciate the music. I didn't ask you to care about the artist, or the producer. All artists die like people do, but true music is ageless and will remain immortal.

Don't turn music into business, or politics, or something else. Music has been around for a longer time than even humans. So stop pretending that its a man-made discovery or invention that can be twisted. LOVE THE MUSIC.

(Su Ziheng, this post is for you, from a music lover, to another. Thank you for inspiring me about a topic on music. I guess having a friend who shares a name really makes a difference.)

Why Do You Live?

2008-03-21T17:03:00.000-07:00

Almost everyone had thought of commiting suicide one time or another in life. Yet most continue to live on, as they see new light. Others who weren't so fortunate... Well, may they find peace in afterlife. If it exists, that is.

However, since we can't prove that it does, let 's assume it doesn't. Then, why would you choose death over life, why choose to end it? Is it because of the accident that happened to you resulting in your crippled condition? Then know that many have been born with worse, yet they continue to flare their spark of life no matter how short the time left for it to burn bright. Is the wound to you mental, rather than physical? Say you've lost loved ones, and not just by death? There've been many who lost everyone they've loved in wars, disasters, famine, yet they found others to love and be loved. Is it simply because you cannot find the drive to live? Then what, exactly, rouses your passion?

What has been the drive to survive for living beings around the world? Observing the history of the living, its obvious that many were drived to be immortal. Not in the sense of lifespan, of course, but every animal and plant wanted to ensure its continued existence on Earth through leaving its trace in the form of genes. Yep, if you can't live on as yourself, then live as the on whom you borne.

But in the civilised life of today's humans, that is not what you'd call "the way". Rather, there are some people who were immortalised for their deeds - both good and bad. Just take Mother Theresa and Adolf Hitler for exaxmple. Yet, not everyone can change the world. You can change the lives of those around you, though. How you change it is entirely your choice.

Before that, there's one step you need to start with. Change yourself. Choose to live, not to die.

Are You Beauty?

2008-03-10T01:53:00.000-07:00

My face looks terrible. Acne dotted everywhere, the skin looks dark red after regular sunburns, and to top it off, parts of it are flaking! Too bad my skin have to endure this until after April, as my training will still continue under the sun 'til then.

Despite the condition of the skin of my face, I still think I don't look uglier than normal. What would you think under the situation? Scream like crazy everytime you look at yourself in the mirror? Groan at the touch of your zits? Come on, pal - feeling bad about yourself does no good to you. If anything, it'll only make you worse - several studies have already proven it. The more you worry, the worse it goes, you worry even more... It's a negative cycle that'll soon leave you in despair if you don't pull through.

A couple of weeks ago, I read a quote from Hannah Tan, Malaysia's popular beauty icon, which says, "Both beauty and health exists naturally in tandem. Neither can be taken for granted." She also sees beauty as "an inner strength and charismatic persona, rather than what people see on the outside".

Of course, you can argue that she's only saying that for show, but that's beyond the point here. She speaks the truth, willingly or not - true beauty is as it does. If you accept that you are beautiful, then you are, no matter what others think of you. (Don't overdo it to the point of vanity, though.)

Then, there's a story about Beauty and Ugly: that they both went for a bath together, and Ugly delibrately left early, wearing Beauty's clothes, leaving her with no choice but to take Ugly's. Beauty does exist within some of those who wear Ugly's dress; sometimes the Beautiful dress is used as a facade by Ugly. We can't judge truly which is which, but we can choose to wear whose dress, and to be with whom truly within.

There are many beautiful things in the world. YOU can choose to be one with them. Still think you're not Beauty? Think again.

The A to Z of Friendship!

2008-02-23T00:25:00.000-08:00

So, what is a friend? He/she is somebody who:

A - accepts you as you are,
B - believes in you,
C - calls you just to say "Hi"
D - doesn't give up on you,
E - envisions the whole of you, including the parts-in-progress,
F - forgives your every mistake,
G - gives unconditionally for you,
H - helps you whenever you need it,
I - inspires you to be the best that you can be,
J - just happy to be with you,
K - keeps you close at heart, anytime, anywhere,
L - loves you for who you are,
M - makes a difference in your life,
N - never judges, no matter what you do,
O - offers support when you're feeling tired,
P - picks you up when you fall,
Q - quiets your fears if they arise,
R - raises your spirits when you're feeling down,
S - says nice things about you, yet
T - tells you the truth when you need to hear it,
U - understands you,
V - values you,
W - walks beside you in life,
X - explains things to you if you don't understand,
Y - yells at you when you won't listen, and
Z - zaps you back to reality!

It'd be cool to have friends like that, eh? Not so fast - in a deceitful world like this, driven by materialism, you'd be lucky to get someone to know you and like you well. Sometimes, you're already lucky that you're not betrayed outright.

There's only one way to make true friends - you gotta be one first. Love another as if he/she was already your best, true friend. If no response in kind was given, you are still blessed, for you can love a friend who doesn't loves you back in the same way. Being loved is bliss, but that of loving another is incomparable.

Spoils that Ruins a Child's Life

2008-02-16T22:31:00.000-08:00

If there's one thing I really detest among those my age, its spoilt brats. Why? They get their way too easily. When the adults start being strict, all they have to do is to use the tactics they know will work things their way - crying, pouting, throwing a tantrum and such - and sooner or later, somebody will give in to their wants. And guess what? They won't hesitate to do it again, and again, and again......

I had a kid cousin who was that sort of child. Man, you should see how he screws up his face and cry, throwing cushions about and delibrately hurrting himself, just to get out to buy an ice-cream! And he's not even nine years old. Now, one of the only relatives he didn't dare to come close to easily is me. Hehe, that's because I never comply with him if it's unreasonable and I can help it. Now, I'm crossing my fingers that he'll grow out of it soon. Or maybe he won't at all......

As for how you'll see if the kids (or guys) down the road are spoilt by their parents or guardians, there's many signs, both obvious and subtle, to look out for. Primarily, he'll always want things to go his way, and he'll often resort to tactics that follow the same pattern to do so. A spoilt person is also very mule-headed - you'd be hard-pressed to convince him to do anything he does not want to, taht is, if you make any progress at all. They usually care only for themselves, and wouldn't give a damn if someone else got hurt in any way just so long as they got what they want.

So, its urgent for parents and guardians to recognise and stamp out the spoiltness as soon as possible in children, otherwise they suffer from it as long as they had the attitude. When you interact with such a person, its best if you tell them where your lines are, and hold firm your ground if they crossed it. In this, you might make the person agitated or upset, but its better than to just lie down and be walked over by him.

In short, be strict, or you'll be downtrodden by these spoilt people forever.

Chinese New Year - Totally New Experience.

2008-02-09T03:13:00.000-08:00

This year's CNY was the most special for me - that's because I went to my mother's hometown for most of the holidays. That's 500 km++ from my house - my back hurts from more than 5 hours travelling in the car. Yet, the journey was nothing compared what I experienced there.

First off, let me try to describe my mother's external family to you. The matron was none other than my maternal grandmother, until she passed away a couple of years ago (mourning). After that, the family was divided into three generations. The eldest was the generation of my mum's - my aunts and uncles, who formed the "elders" of the clan. Next up is the Younger Generation A, which consists of my elder cousins, those who were already working, with some already married. The oldest among the group was cousin Kok Heng, married with a thirteen-year old daughter (So that makes me an uncle. Hehe). He was the undisputed ringleader, though he still refers to the elders for family decisions. Lastly, its the Younger Generation B, my age. Amongst them, I'm the third eldest. My niece was in this clique too.

Alright, back to the story. At the end of our journey, warm greetings were already in order. We greet our elders one by one, then clap the backs of those our ages. A little hustling was in order as my cousin Fong wanted to rub my lil' bro's head. Then, we stuff away the things we brought, giving the presents away to some relatives, and settled down for the reunion dinner on the CNY eve. However, there's too much of us for the table, so we take turns to eat our fill. Oops...

Skipping to CNY Day One...... My, my, those red packet stack everyone's holding must be half an inch thick! The elders are giving them out, but they still have a veritable stack left. And those of us that are still single...... I'll leave it to you to guess.

Reverting back to nighttime...... Of course, we play lots of...... music CDs, since firecrackers are not allowed. Still, it was a treat since we get to stay up until well past midnight playing about, something I can hardly do back home.

But, after all the things that we do as a family, there's more within than meets the eye. As I lie down in the wee hours of the morning, thinking, I came upon this conclusion - that its the family bond here that keeps us together, that makes me truly feel at home here. All in all, CNY is, of course, not about enjoying yourself until you reek of enjoyment - its about having and keeping a family that you truly belongs.

Happy New Year to you all, and may you and your families recieved the best blessings from everyone else.

Windows to the Soul

2008-01-20T01:20:00.000-08:00

Most of the times, having the eyes of human - instead that of a cat or dog - is really, really cool. I'm talking about the one advantage our eyes have over other animal's - The ablity to percieve multiple types and shades of colour.

True, chickens and fishes have been proved to be able to recognised certain colours, but has any animal been proven to be ablle to see the world we do? To see a myriad of colours, to appreciate its beauty? Assuredly, canines couldn't, and neither could felines. They sacrificed that in order to obtain night vision or other adaptations to their other senses.

Yet, for me, I definitely could not trade my eyes for any other pair, beast or human. Even if they're already 1000 degrees near-sighted, with a couple hundreds in astigmatism. Oops...... Still, I guess these eyes are my own, and therefore are mine, since they let ohthers see into my soul the way other eyes couldn't. Also, I think my near-sightedness could be something to be proud of. I mean, have you ever known somebody who reached such a level of eyesight impair? Among my own friends, only one rivals mine.

Alright, enough about my eyes. Let's talk about those that belong to the citizens of the Animalia kingdom. Alright, sorry for the cats and dogs out there - no pun intended when I said you guys can't see in colour. That's because I did admire some features of your eyes - like the way they could percieve darkness that mine couldn't, not to mention the way they glow in the dark, reflecting the minimal light available. If I had that, maybe I could scare robbers off in the dead of the night. Right, wishing wistfully while moving on......

Hey, what 'bout yours? Yep, your eyes that you're using to read this post? Mind leave a comment and describe your eyes to me?

Rolling Instead of Walking

2008-01-03T04:39:00.000-08:00

"Wanna roll?"
"Yeah."
"Then let's grab the skates."

This is the catch phrase for my pals when we met each other at the newest mall in town (okay, it's already been opened fo some months now) as an aproximately 50-square-metre skating ring opens up for business. Should you answer "No" to the first query, you get shunned way out of the clique.

What else could I do but to agree?

Luckily, my pals were decent enough not to laugh on my face when I told them it was a first for me. So, we paid for the ticket, changed our footwear, and started.

Turns out, I'm having three blisters the size of my thumb after one hour in the ring and about ten falls. Still, I think I get why the guys visited here every time they strolled over (other than to just pass the time, of course).

It takes practice, but after you got the hang of it, it feels awesome - the wind on your face even though the surrounding air wasn't moving, the way you zipped along mostly on one foot, looking as if you'll fall at the slightest provocation, but keeping your stance in perfect balance, the looks of awe on the faces of newbies as you rushed past them, you body inches from theirs... I can already imagine the scene, adrenaline pumping through my veins even when I'm not moving.

Even if my foot was aching murderously after the event (I came off last during an illegal race with my buddies) , I'd still jump on the chance to do it again after I'm healed. Though what may happen during, and after, the time remains unknown......

The End of the Beginning of the End...

2007-12-27T05:20:00.000-08:00

So, there it is. The end of the year. The inexorable march of time that brings us all one step further in our life. So what does the future hold?

My personal answer - nothing but hope. And, if the said hope proves false, danger and fear in its stead. A friend of mine once said that the future will never come to be, 'cause when it does its the present, not the future.

What about the past, you may ask? They're but memories to me, some sweet, some bitter, most mixed in both; some true to last, others misleading. Well, at least I know partly what Brom (from Eragon, by C. Paulini) the storyteller feels like now - to look back, and know that one remembers not much of it, then to look forward, and know that something still lies before one's self.

If you read the Erevis Cale Trilogy, you'd know that Cale, the butler cum assassin-follower of Mask, decided that while his future may be determined without his consent, he chooses how he would walk his path of life, to his end. I believe his point - our fate is chosen for us, whether by other-worldly rules, or by our own subconcious personalities. Yet, we can chose what path we take towards that goal, though if given the chance, I'd prefer to be able to know what's going to come up in the future.

Still, unless we end our lives here and now, there's no other choice but to go forward. If only life was like a video game, with saves and reloads if you make a blunder. But it isn't. So many thanks all the best to you for reading this. As hunters may say, "Good hunting."

On the Week 'Fore Christmas, What I Had Recieved...

2007-12-17T04:59:00.000-08:00

...Was a note to ask me - though not in person - to spread word so that the seed of kindness, long buried in someone's heart, may grow into a blooming plant.

And, well, I thought, just in time. So, I decided to see what Christmas has for us to offer. In the olden days, people treat Christmas as a holy tradition. People sang carols, prayed for peace, light candles as a sign that visitors are welcomed. A couple of years later, peoples' lives were better. Christmas turned into a holiday - kids loved to crawled into the bed, excited, fall asleep two seconds later, then wake up in the morning, to find gifts from Father Christmas - actually, it awas their parents, of course.

Now, seeing it as me, no longer a kid, I noticed more and more commercially-orientated Christmas, as do every other holiday. Try walking through one mall, and you'll see a couple of conifer trees, lots of red hats, and more than one Santa Claus when you're lucky. Not that there's no more peace and "holiness" (for lack of better word) in Christmas, but just that I find it harder to see such a point.

So, what can we do this Christmas? Aside from doing the same each year (join the crowd, or stay at home for a rest), try to preserve the "endangered species" that is the original Christmas spirit by doing a special kind deed or two. You can help somebody to reach their destination, carry a load up a floor, or even give a sincere praise to that guy next door.

People feel better after doing something good - if you didn't, see me and I'll give you all my money. Its the satishfaction and peace that you've done something to help hat encourages you to do more. So at least try - spread the love this Christmas.

Its Just Emotions

2007-12-10T04:41:00.001-08:00

" 'There's no shame in what you are feeling, Harry...... on the contrary, the ability to feel pain like this is your greatest strength,' Dumbledore said calmly.

'Look, I don't want to talk about how I feel, alright?' Harry said heatedly.

'Harry, suffering like this proves that you are still a man! This pain is part of being human-'

'THEN-I-DON'T-WANT-TO-BE-HUMAN! I-DON'T-CARE!' screamed Harry until his voice broke, while he seized Dumbledore's instruments and hurled them all over the office.

Dumbledore merely observe Harry demolishing his office before replying, 'You do care. You care so much you feel as though you'll bleed to death by the pain of it.' "

- Excerpted from J.K. Rowling's "Harry Potter and The Order of The Phoenix"

If you are in Harry's shoes, how would you feel? Know that you must live without a family for thirteen years, to suddenly found someone as close to you as a family can be, only to lose him/her, by a mistake you felt you should have avoided?

Would you do as he does, yelling till you're hoarse that you won't care, while inside you're tearing apart? Would you show no feelings, but inside you're still grieving to the point of insanity?

Nowadays, people would chose the latter over the former - to grieve for someone, especially in front of others, was now treated as weakness rather than compassion. My regrets considering the situation, since that the griever who does so often end up really, really bad. Its like trying to wall-in a flood - when you can't hold it any longer, it breaks and come forth multiple times worse than when you first felt it.

"Oh, well, we'll get over it," you say. But to get over it, you have to let it go first, not clinging to it. And, well, I've yet to find a better way to let it go than to just express it, no matter how histerical it'll come out. Everybody feels better after doing so - the first step to move on to the future is to let go of the present.

Wanderings of the Abodeless

2007-12-07T04:41:00.000-08:00

"Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses,
Yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your
Teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest tossed,
To me; I lift my lamp, beside, the golden door!"

- Excerpted and adapted from Emma Lazarus's poem of the Statue of Liberty, America.

Telcontar is a worn traveller, that read the excerpt and envisioned a place that was not his homeland, but feels as intimate to himself as that homeplace of his; a place, where, he knew he'd feel safe and comfortable, though not exactly, home. To him, it worked just fine, for his so-called "home" was lost to him for a long time. He was one of those people that called themselves "the Abodeless" - the people whom had never thought of a place as a real home.

He had been to deserts, savannahs, forests, mountains of untold heights, oceans of width immeasurable by himself; by today's technologies, those places he visited could have been charted as a whole map.

He was always alone. It wasn't that he didn't attract felllow Abodeless to offer going together with him; its just that he found company trying and he preferred to be alone. And it was just as well - there had been circumstances where he'd could've survived only by himself.

Now, he had an impulse to go aganist the Abodeless'es rule of going without any direction - he wanted to see where the place described in the poem looks like. He was disapointed. Turns out, his fate was probably to wander abodeless forever.

Upon further reflection, he realised that he was, in fact, at home - his wanderings to found a place to belong has become a place to belong. With a small sile at the notion, he turned his back and walked straight to the horizon, his figure shrinking out of sight.

What Will Leaders Do Without Followers? (or anything of the sort)

2007-11-22T01:43:00.000-08:00

Doing chores upon my father's bidding, I suddenly come accross the thought, "Dad does the ordering, I do the working. If I'm not around, is Dad the one doing it instead of ordering?" Why, of course.

Well, in a group, people usually need one of themselves to lead the others, or they get confused about what should be done next. If everyone does their own stuff as an individual, what good would a group be?

What I would despise though, is the way some leaders would abuse their authority, such as lording people about to fulfil every single whim. To me, things like that only concern certain fields - Eg. you may be my boss at work, but when we clock out, there's no reason for you to ask me polish your shoes (even if I had to during work).

As everybody knows, a leader only exist when he/she has others to follow him/her, so a leader should place his/her own welfare after - and only after - the welfare of others. Doing otherwise ensures you get deserted, to state the obvious.

Maybe that's why democracy is so popular - when you don't like the leader, get everybody else to throw him down (and probably putting yourself up in the progress).

Hmm...... Cool idea.

As a saying goes, "An empire is like a tree - a king's the treetop, the citizens the roots. without the roots, the tree would surely fall." Let's hope the little cliche you're leading stays standing - you know how to maintain it so.

Religion - Its All In the Core

2007-11-12T02:15:00.001-08:00

I'm quite sure that many of you out there believe that the Creator exist, albeit in the form that you believe Him to be. It is in this belief, thus formed the religions of the people in the world we now today. Buddhism, Islam, Hinduism, Christianism, and many others have brought mental peace within people, bolstering them with new strength and letting them see a new light in their lives.

Yet, sometimes, its inevitable that some followers may turn fanatic in their beliefs, and instead of giving what they can to aid others and spread love, they went and done something harmful, which may even be irreparable. Its not to say that the religions misled these people - merely that they pitifully saw the twisted truth in their own mind.

These people, fanatics if you will, failed to see the truth behind this - as well as all other good - religious beliefs - to spread love instead of harm is what we can and should do. Courage, passion, righteousness - these are among the qualities people shhould have, regardless of their religion. A religion is, among other things, a way for us to discover and utilise the good within us, so that we do not regress into the barbaric ways that are able to destroy us totally.

Yet, for those who maintain a belief other than ours, why shouldn't we show the same compassion for them as we have shown those whom we love because the two of us share the same religion? It is my opinion that a place of multi-religious people can and should love each other without any trappings, be it skin colour or beliefs.

It is the main message of religion that makes it revered - love. So, even though a man may not share your point of view in this delicate matter, so long as he/she loves you (in any way of relationship), it is your fortune to be loved so.

Education - What's Good for Whom

2007-11-12T01:10:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, to say the least, education wears the passion out of youngsters. How many kids and teens out there like sitting still more than running around playing games? Not to say education was not fun at all, but really, not everyone can bring themselves to bear through the process of sitting quietly non-stop for eight hours a day, much less like it. Still, government policies made it so that it's the daily battle some have to struggle through during a period they call "term time", in modern countries.

Really, why should we just force knowledge into the next generation nowdays as if we are stuffing ingredients into a duck in preparation for the dish? As many would have known by now, not everyone can learn by simply sitting still and listen. There are much more who would rather take apart machines and rebuild them to learn how it works, who would rather live lterally in kitchens to finesse their art of cooking, and even those who would rather endure the heat of the desert just to uncover some artifact of a lost civilisation.

But, in their childhood years, when they would most likely develop a passion for somethiing they thought of pursuing as a life, they were forced to listen to teachers' lectures about ethics, literacy, history, etc. *sigh* When someone tries to protest, those who were for that type of "duck-stuffing" education just say, "They'll get through, like we did. It's all for their own good."

WHAT KIND OF CRAP IS THAT???

Please, everyone, why don't we just let them choose their path, their way of life? Children nowadays are becoming more matured than they were some generations ago. They were able to distinguish what they like from what they don't. So just trust the kids - let them do it their way. We only need to let let them know that we're there with them all the way, that we'll help if they need it.

Often, a single solution does not work for everyone. So help the next generation by letting them find theirs. Its one of the ways to let them retain their passion throughout their lives. Otherwise, we might indirectly snuffed it out, turning them into mindless minions walking the life laid down forcibly by others. This way, how could we evolve, how could we improve at all?

A Mutation of Sorts - Hedgehog Survival

2007-10-26T06:43:00.000-07:00

"Mutation - it is the key to evolution. It has enabled us to evolve from a single-cell organism into the dominant species on the planet. This process is slow, normally taking thousands and thousands of years... But every few hundred millenia, evolution leaps forward... ... And while our bodies may be gone, our lessons are eternal."

- Charles Xavier, from the novelization of X-Men III: The Last Stand

Mutation actually means an unexpected, and often extreme, changes in the genes of living beings that produced one or many individuals with different characteristics compared to the "normal" majority of the species. However, should the said change affects the majority of the population, it will take less than a couple of generations for the mutation to remain the norm. (Eg. teens using short forms when chatting online now starts to affect even formal writing)

Yet, this is not the kind of mutation I'm talking about, to explain it fully, let me start with some stuff about hedehogs. Well protected even under normal circumstances by spines on their backs, hedgehogs fully utilised their defence mechanism when threatened by curling up into a ball. This proves to be nearly flawless, as only the most cunning and patient predators can outwait and outsmart the spiny balls.

Nowadays, though, as urbanization begins to invade the woodlands that made up hedgehog habitats, particularly in UK, hedgehogs' best defense strategy had proved fatal to them.

Try to imagine this scenario: a hedgehog crossing a road was noticed by a passing car, but not in time to slow down or swerve out of the way before the hedgehog gets ran over. The driver still floors the brakes, while honking loudly. The animal senses the danger, naturally, and reacts as it would to a predator - curling up. Needless to say, the outcome was not pretty.

Now, though, animal lovers may rejoice. reports from a certain HogWatch shows that hedgehogs now develop a kind of "mutation" in the development of their defense stratagems, after centuries without tampering with. When hedgehogs felt threatened on hard tar roads, they no longer curl up. Instead, they run, even though they are not built to mive quickly. Only when their feet encounter soft earth do they resume curling up. Some still don't make it to the other side, but it's a start that they are adapting to survive.

This, is their "mutation" - not in a genetic way, but a fast adaptation nevertheless for the survival of their species, and one that will surely become more and more common, as human population take over increasingly more habitats of these animals.

Diamonds - how d'you choose 'em?

2007-10-22T04:58:00.000-07:00

Try to ask a jeweller this question, "How much does a diamond cost?" A typical one would sigh, then started to explain profusely the factors affecting a diamond's price. More often than not, The answers you'd get would leave you more confused than before. (Laughs)

Although, at the very least, you should have heard about the "4Cs" - Carat, Cut, Clarity and Colour. Any jeweller worth the trade never misses out these factors that plummets or rockets skyhigh the price of any diamonds. (If the one you meet did not mention any of the above, he/she is probably a fake jeweller. Its likely that his/her gems are hoaxes, too)

Carat, of course, means weight. (1 carat equals about 0.2 grams) When compared, a 2 carat diamond is rarer than a 1 carat diamond of the exact properties. However, as a diamond's volume does not increase in proportion to the weight, You'd rather get one with a weight that looks good enough on your finger as well as one that don't burn you moneybags into ashes.

Cut stands for the way the diamond is polished and proportioned so that the diamonds' brilliance may be shown fully. It also stands for the shape the diamond has been cut into. The most popular cut is known as the Round Modern Brilliant Cut, which contains different varieties such as heart shapes and pear shapes. A subtly cut diamond can refract light from any direction to all directions, which gives the diamond a sparkling brilliance.

Colour is also an important element when choosing a diamond. Not for the sake of the gem itself,
but rather as the diamond's colour may well reflect your personality as an accessory (albeit an expensive one). A diamond with a colour that suits you on the inside shows on the outside, meaning when you wear a jewellery with a diamond you like a lot, it sort of enhances your flair in life, an aura that some may find breathtaking.

Lastly, there's the clarity of the stone. Generally, clarity means imperfections within the diamond that may affect the beauty of the diamond. If I may, I stressed the word may, since the said imperfections are microscopic, i.e. normally unnoticed under the naked eye. Starting from flawless, and going down to rejection, higher-graded diamonds are, of course, rarer and more expensive than their low-graded counterparts. Still, for normal consumers, a diamond that seems perfect enough is, well, perfect enough. I personally don't think its wise for those with a slightly tight budget to go for a IF (Internally Flawless) diamond.

In a nutshell, if I were to go and buy a diamond for my girlfriend, I'd take her along, let her choose the colour that's to her liking, then take the best cut, seemingly-without-imperfection, best-sized-for-her-finger diamond. I'll pay by cheque, and request to the bank for an unlimited overdraft beforehand. (I'm joking! Really!)

Got the balls to floor it?

2007-10-10T00:01:00.000-07:00

So, if you're from Asia, partucularly Malaysia, let me introduce you to a sport - floorball. If you're an European, I don't see any reasons why you don't know this game - unless you've been too busy to care about anything in the world, that is.

Now, back to floorball. It's sort of like floor hockey, only the sticks are lighter (no more serious injuries) and the puck is replaced by a hollow plastic ball (safe projectile to hit in games). YOU play it in teams of threes or fives, give or take the keeper. The team who scores the most in the three 20-minutes session wins (duh!)

Well, I got to know this game two years ago, when the local club actually come to my high school in my first year there to ormote the sport. However, my interests are sparked only about three months ago in a fit of deja vu when the same local club put up an article on the newspaper. I went to check it out with 'couple of my friends, and voila! I got hitched on and am playing regularly now.

What the game requires is a stick per player (about 80 USD each), a ball (<5>, as it's equipments are made for floorball enthusiasts, by floorball enthusiasts. You can check out the Canadien official website for more details, such as your local retailer or even special events.

All in all, this is a sport like many others - sportsmanship, teamwork and personal skills being of the same importance and all that - but it is actually fun. As it isn't very popular yet, you had a great chance in making it a hit. Should you suceeded, you could take it on to a higher level and become a bigger star. Think of this - the first members of the teams of the English Floorball League! How awesome is that?